A Cracked Pot

Matthew 25:35-36

2011-06-18T16:26:00.002+10:00

"...when I was a stranger you invited me in..." Well we didn't quite invite so does it still apply? This morning Mal and I woke up to a young man sleeping in our guest room. He had left his shoes at the front door and curled up and went to sleep, apparently. Mal and I don't know - we didn't hear a thing.

Mal and I discussed when this may have happened wondering if he had just come in after Mal had unlocked the front door this morning. Then Mal remembered the shoes were in front of the door when he opened it. At that time, Mal had blamed me for the shoes in front of the door. Mal and I had walked around the house and Mal had actually entered the room with the sleeping young man a couple of times before we even realized we had a house guest.

Before we knew his story, while discussing what to do, we quickly decided that he must have really only wanted/needed a bed because that was what he took. He had even been polite enough to leave his shoes at the door. So we left him, sleeping and I began to call him Jesus.

We thought that maybe, the boarder in the flat next door might have sent him over. Nope. Mal tried to wake him and he said he was cold so we put another blanket on the bed and let him sleep. Eventually, Mal had to leave the house (I had left for a meeting) so Mal woke him and he was confused at first then embarrassed.

"Weren't there people and a party here last night?" he asked. "No" Mal replied. He said, Maybe, I drank too much. I just remember being so cold." No wonder it was 35F/2C last night and he had no coat. He told Mal his name, where he worked and apologized many times.

He apparently wandered out of his party and thinking he was wandering back in entered our 'locked' house. Okay, the door locks but the house has moved and sometimes it doesn't really latch and a push on the door opens it in spite of the lock but that only happens once in a while....I thought.

I will actually be more diligent in ensuring the door is locked at night but also know I will feel a bit guilty and wonder if there is someone out there that needs an unlocked door. I pray they ring the bell....

Resolution

2011-03-16T10:52:00.002+10:00

How are you doing at your New Year's resolutions? I have lost a small bit of weight but overall, I have not done too well and have maintained the fitness level I had at New Year.

Now it is Lent, the 40 days plus Sundays before Easter. It is the season that in tradition people sacrificed something in penitence remembering that Jesus sacrificed His life. Following this tradition can be a holy and sacred experience for people who go into it for those reasons. I have for many years, given up different things each year for Lent. Each year, I realize how dependent I am on things rather than God. Last year I gave up coffee and struggled because I learned that coffee is a crutch I use in stressful times, I suppose like some people use cigarettes or alcohol. Most days, I did not miss the coffee but when stuff happened, the craving was - well I usually gave in.

Lenten sacrifices can be like New Years resolutions, we forget the purpose behind the resolution. We forget the lessons that life taught us so we do not keep the resolution. This weekend, I remembered why I made the New Years resolution to be more fit. There was a tug-of-war competition at the family reunion. I do want to be fit enough to do these things - so back on track for fitness.

I am still dependent on coffee, even this morning waiting for a tough phone call I had another cup. I, however, turned to God first and thanked God for allowing me to have the crutch and hoped that God knew I need God more than the coffee.

I am glad that Lent (and New Year for that matter) come around regularly so that I can each year renew afresh my memory and commitment of what I believe.

Deep sigh

2011-02-10T08:39:00.002+10:00

Well being cut off by flood water was not the end of the story. I found myself in Goodna, a flood devastated community between Ipswich and Brisbane. I spent ten days there and found myself humbled by the enormity of our God.

The enormity of the flood was too big for my imagination and during the ten days, God proved many times that he is indeed bigger.

Cyclone Yasi steam rolled a good part of N. Queensland and I expect that many there will be humbled by God's grace.

No, I did not see supernatural stuff, just people responding, because God had whispered in their ear to respond. People who rang up and said, "I have a (fill in the blank) is that something that will help?" exactly at the time that (fill in the blank) was needed. This happened over and over again. I was overwhelmed at the generosity of so many.

Like in Roma last year or The Gap a couple of years ago, I know that the work will take months to complete the work ahead; homes to be rebuilt or torn down. Lives will take years to normalize.

Right now all that I have to offer is a deep sigh.

2011 look back at 2010

2011-01-14T10:40:00.003+10:00

This time last year, rain had started to fall in the Maranoa Region of Queensland staving off what was expected to be one of the worst drought related mass killing of starving livestock. In one week's time this country turn from a dust bowl that I thought would not grow anything into lush and beautiful country. The area here still looks lovely. There was an abundance of spring flowers. Every thing is green. 2010 will be known as the second wettest year on record for this region, averaging 2/3 an inch of rain per week (that is 17 mil/week).

This week was dry. Yay. But only here. The rest of Queensland only miles from us is under water. Our road has been cut off for some time. It is expected that our McDonalds will close tomorrow from lack of supplies. Milk is being flown in. When we do get food again they will be expensive because all the prime agricultural land in Queensland is flooded. At our local grocery store the only fresh fruit or veg is lemons.

Today, I am making lemonade.

Where does time go?

2010-11-18T07:51:00.003+10:00

I am not sure where time goes. I have heard many people say that recently near the end of the year. Where did the year go they ask? I reply, "if you find where it went let me know I need it back." Since my last post in Sept. I have spent a week at Australian Catholic University in Brisbane for a Masters unit (intensive) on reconciliation. Good choice. I have been to Western Australia for a Rural Ministry Conference. Again Good choice. There have been numerous other meetings, my regular full-time work, reading and writing to complete the subject I took, and then a few funerals. Funerals in a regional centre means quite a bit of travel. The result, badabing, no time or more correctly time has passed without me doing the wonderful projects that I wanted to get to. I assume that those cool projects were not too important, of course, if I didn't start no one knows they if they were or not.

The result seems to be that I am not motivated. I don't want to start as I am not sure if there is time to do a good job. There is a bit of why bother. There is a bit of feeling overwhelmed. There is a bit of being tired and after a rush period needing a slow time. Plod is the word of the day. Advent is around the corner and I will encourage people to wait with anticipation. Guess, I am leading the way.

ouch!

2010-09-18T10:20:00.003+10:00

My question is does worker's compensation cover injuries inflicted by magpies?

This morning, Mal was at a men's breakfast and I was doing some reading and preparation to meet a family this afternoon to plan a funeral. After my reading was complete, I wanted to shift modes and do some reflection on the sermon text, Luke 16, Jesus seems to say choose God or money in a reality that in the West Christian have both (topic for some other blog entry).

I decided that it was a quiet cool morning and that I should go for a walk to be with God in his creation and set out to pass the railway dam thinking the destination should be McDonald's for a coffee (knowing Mal would be by that way shortly and would love to drive me home).

I knew there were magpies in the school yard near the McDonald's but was not overly concerned. I now know the great emotional and physical distress a small melodious creation of God can cause.....

After being swooped, I ran as hard as I could past the school yard with my jacket over my head. I looked back to see the magpie a half a block behind still on the corner. I had stepped out a block and a half and being only metres from McDonalds slowed to a walk and lowered my jacket. In a moment, I received a whack on the head that I knew had drawn blood. Greatly startled, I took cover while uttering a curse and wished evil on part of God's creation; yes, the very creation that I had just left my house to be close to. Close enough to draw blood had not been the idea and I insist is simply too close.

Very quickly, I realized that I am in a small town and people know that I am the Uniting Church minister so embarrassed I looked around to see who may have witnessed me audibly cursing one of God's creatures. I stopped; asked God to bless the bird and walk slowly with my hand on my head to my destination.

I ordered my sandwich and Mal arrived before the coffee came. He was sympathetic and promised to "kiss it better". I have now had a shower and am nursing the lump on head wondering if and how this was meant to enlighten my sermon....

Dulacca, Queensland

2010-05-15T17:30:00.003+10:00

Roma is a 6 hour drive from Brisbane. We were driving home to Roma from Brisbane on Friday. As it turned out we were a bit over an hour from home at noon. We were both tired and a bit hungry so we decided not to push through to get home but to stop at the next small town and have some lunch and a break.

We have driven through this town several times by now and have always notices how popular the pub seemed to be so we thought that it would be a good choice for lunch. When we got there the pub looked closed. Well, this is a small town so that can appear to be so but may not be the case so Mal walked over and pulled on the door and it was in fact open. He went in and asked if they served lunch. The young woman there said, "The cook is down at the servo (read gas station in America) and I don't know when he will be back." Mal questioned and learned that the cook owns the servo. I giggled so hard that shortly after noon we get sent to the servo when the normal stop is the pub.

So down to the servo, we see there is a new Chinese restaurant. We go in and are met by a Chinese man. We ordered the lunch special and had piping hot fresh Chinese food that was better than most. We had a five star meal in a two star town.

So if you are ever in Dulacca. Stop at the servo. Cheers.

the north wind doth blow and we shall have....

2010-05-06T19:32:00.003+10:00

Hayfever! That is right. The north wind in Roma this time of year brings with it pollen from grass. I have never had hayfever before I moved to Roma. Now, I understand, the watery eyes, runny nose, and oh the sneezing, violent sneezing. There is something in the air that my immune library is totally unfamiliar with and it is reacting full on.

The locals when they hear me snuffle first ask if I have a cold and when I respond, "Hayfever." They say, "Oh yes, the north wind. Hayfever sufferers are often bothered by the north wind." Funny, I had never been a hayfever sufferer. But there ya go, now I am. I hope that I grow out of it.

Why God won't let me take myself too seriously - Part 5

2010-04-17T18:19:00.002+10:00

Even in Roma, God does not let me take myself too seriously. The church is running the canteen (read concession stand in America) and I asked one of the ladies at church to pick me up and drive me. I told her Mal had the car which is true and that I would need a lift. She sounded a bit hesitant but I insisted and she agreed. So this morning, she comes by, picks me up, drives me the 2 blocks down our street to the field and parks. I laughed so hard. I had never seen the field used and presumed it sort of abandoned like the park across the street from me. But no, it was soon loaded with kids and parents from across the region. I had assumed all the fields were across town where I had seen activity when I asked for the lift. While I was laughing, she asked if she hadn't told me the name of the field. I assured her she had but the name meant nothing to me having only been here 8 months there is still a lot I don't know. There were more laughs during the day. But next week, I will walk to the rugby.

The word for today is....

2010-03-05T12:09:00.003+10:00

Theodicy. Yup. Theodicy. A word coined (made up) by Leibniz to refer to a theoretical justification of the goodness of God in the face of the presence of evil in the world (McGrath, Christian Theology, glossary). Or in my language what has a good God to do with suffering.

Our town Roma has been partly under flood waters. There are many not complaining because most people knew that it would take a flood to break the decade long drought. But for those who lost so much....where is God, in this? Sunday's reading may help. Luke 13:1-9.

I know that this passage can be misused but Jesus seems to be insisting that the question is not about God but about us. What are we doing different because life is fragile? Change your mind, turn back, remember God' s grace, you have another chance.

Compliments to Working Preacher for some of these ideas.

Discipline

2010-02-16T07:46:00.002+10:00

I have not posted for a month or so. I struggle with maintaining the discipline. This is not only evident in my blogging but also in other areas of my life; fitness, prayer, and fasting for example. These are things that I really want to do, in fact, really need to do, however; I do them well for a while then they drift away for a time.

As we approach the Church season of Lent, I am reminded of my commitment to these disciplines in my life. As I look back over the past few weeks, I recognize that I have been pretty slack about maintaining them. I have even spent a bit of time, feeling overly guilty and weak for not being able to do what in my heart I so would like to. This guilt should not turn to self-abasement but guilt should result in a repentance so to speak a turning back to the discipline. But I do feel bad, I wonder why can't I do this? When I see so many disciplined people around me, I wonder what is wrong with me? The answer nothing is wrong with me.

I have been convinced over and over again in my life the reason I am not as successful at something is because I am attempting to do it alone. My successes have never been me by myself, actions, there has been a community supporting me. For example, I don't have trouble with finances, because a grew up in a family that taught and encouraged fiscal responsibility. It continued to be part of family discussions for my whole life and didn't just crop up during the global economic crisis. I learned as a young person to keep a budget and continue to keep one so that I can demonstrate that to my children. We do this together, my family by in large is unaffected the recent economic downturn. I am proud of our kids, who in spite of obstacles like no job, continue to be resourceful and manage what they have.

At New Years, I resolved to get fitter, loose a few pounds/kilos and till now have not been very successful. I have not been a part of a community to which fitness is important. Yesterday, I joined a gym. I entered a community that would support me and keep me accountable, as in miss me when I am not there and tell me so. I did this after trying to drum up some support from people I already knew. However, fitness is not a priority in their lives at the moment. I am suffering for my choice a bit today, I had never really heard of body pump before and have discovered that neither had my muscles.

But what about other disciplines I mentioned at first? What about prayer? Well the Christian community here in Roma prays together in a seven hour vigil one Saturday per month. That is good. I pray in worship every Sunday. I try to do daily prayers, morning and evening, however, I am certain that praying the offices is easier to do when in a monastic community as the prayers are done together. I wonder if I will find others willing to stop their day and pray? Otherwise, I will continue to do a patchy job at it.

Fasting. I have encouraged people to consider fasting for Lent. Many here have not done so. For years now, my family has used Lent as an opportunity to remind ourselves that we do not need everything that we think we do. We use the opportunity to give up sweets or even one year meat, in order to understand communities that do not have those things. I have been fortunate that my family is part of the community that makes fasting a priority.

Overall, I really can't complain too much because I do have supportive communities around me. I pray for all those people out there who seem to think that they must go it alone.

Rain

2010-01-12T17:38:00.005+10:00

We have gone from the above to the below in only a couple of weeks. Creation is amazing.

Novelty items

2009-12-31T19:53:00.004+10:00

Yes, I admit I have purchased novelties in the past. In a cedar chest in South Dakota I have a Ronald Reagan drinking glass. There is a story behind this purchase. You see, I was in Washington D.C. the week before Mr. Reagan was inaugurated as president of the United States. I had the opportunity to attend the inauguration thanks to Rep. Clint Roberts; however, because I was on a school trip, the school would not let me stay even with my parents permission. I knew this was for me a once in a lifetime experience and since I live in Australia, I was probably right.

So I sulked and purchased Reagan memorabilia.

Today, in the grocery store in Roma, I found and interesting novelty item. Yes, indeed, Obama dolls, many of them stacked above a couple of Churchill dolls. I was very interested to see US presidential stuff in the grocery store in Roma. Churchill didn't surprise me because, the Queen of England is still a figure head of some sort here.

I may have expected to find Obama dolls in the city but out here? Well, and above Churchill well only 60 years or so will verify that.

So the photo, sorry for the quality, I am still learn to use the phone camera.

Happy New Year to you and whatever doll you play with!.

A week before Christmas

2009-12-18T09:10:00.002+10:00

A week before Christmas

and all through the house

is disorder and chaos

and could be a mouse.

The stockings are hung by the

gas heater with care

but heat won't be needed

its summer out here.

Nestling in bed might be nice

but there's work to be done.

Carol services to finish

meals to plan

The kids will be visiting

and friends will stop too.

And what about those here

with nothing else to do?

I expect that on Christmas

there will be a clatter

of voices and dishes

relationships ringing!

Sorry Santa you're not the star

of the day we celebrate

but relationship with God

his Son incarnate.

Merry Christmas.

The things you see

2009-12-07T15:35:00.003+10:00

Mal and I were driving down a residential street this week and suddenly we saw a weedeater or whippersnipper (you get the picture) fly onto the sidewalk with great force. There was a disgruntled man walking away. He happened to look up at us just as we passed. Mal and I kept straight faces until we were by but then lost it. Mal said, "I have wanted to do that on many occasion." I thought he must have been embarrassed a bit by being caught. It was really funny. I hope the bloke had a bit of a laugh over it too.

Then today we had a coffee at a nice coffee shop. For those who don't know you leave a door or window open when using an evaporative cooler. This coffee shop had the door open and in flies a willy wagtail. This bird fly directly in lit in front of the counter momentarily. Hopped around tables, flew to the window where the food comes from the kitchen. Flew past the women at the register barely clearing her head, which made all the staff and us laugh. He checked things out very thoroughly. Then left out the door again. He clearly knew his way around. The staff then told us, through their laughter and ours that they had named the bird Hoover and he comes in two or three times a day making a circuit. We were clearly in his territory.

Fencing

2009-11-23T14:30:00.003+10:00

Building our faith, or discipling, is a bit like building fence. We have these theological concepts that form the corner post or strainers. Concepts, on hand that God reigns, Christ is king and on the other hand, Jesus came to serve and was crucified. These seemingly opposing ideas give us hymns like "The Servant King". But I imagine a fence. The opposing ideas at each end; the divine Jesus on one end and the human Jesus on the other. Our faith is wire that stretches in between. If we have one end but not the other the wire is propped up on one end and one end and lays down at the other and you don't have a fence. If you don't have well developed corner strainers then the will not hold the weight of the wire and will eventually sag and the result again is no fence. Both ends must be strong, then the faith wire must be held taut between the two. Too tight, the wire breaks. Not tight enough, it sags and again no fence. But wait, there's more! Between the two corners are many little ideas, I'll call them posts. They must line up between the two. They do not need to be level or even too straight to begin with. But if a post is out of alignment for a long time it will wear on the wire and create rust and the wire may break. So it is imperative that you walk the fence from time to time; regularly, starting at one end and check each post for weakness moving posts and adjusting wire along the way. A good fence draws admiration to the property it creates the boundary for. A good fence can stand alone for some time. It can take the normal pressure of livestock but also can often withstand flood, blizzard, and small fires, in Australia called cool burns. After huge disasters fences need repair. We need to spend time again starting at one end walking to the other repairing the damage. Rarely, though do you have to repair the corners, if they were well built in the beginning. Yesterday, I took my congregation fencing. Some even seemed to enjoy it.

Desert Limes

2009-11-03T13:34:00.003+10:00

Today, Mal and I experience a Roma treat. Desert Lime Jam. A member of the congregation with connections to Tourism Roma gave us a small introductory size sampler. It came with a brochure that gave serving suggestions. We tried the Desert Lime Jam over a bit of vanilla ice cream and we were both sold. Mal stated the more he ate the more he liked it. I found quite good and dipped into the jar for a bit more as I had been maybe a bit conservative at the onset. I will look for new ways to enjoy this local treat. And for any readers in desert locales that enjoy citrus, the tree is an Australian native citrus glauca. The product that I can honestly recommend is found at Australian Desert Limes. Enjoy

interesting conversation

2009-10-16T14:18:00.002+10:00

What do you talk about after church during fellowship time? Maybe you get into a deeper discussion about the sermon. Or maybe just polite conversation about the weather, boys, girls, relationships, kids, grandkids, or work. Maybe it is about natural disasters, news items, global economics, or world poverty. Maybe you chat about upcoming projects or studies. Sometimes you have conversations, that are just fun - light banter. Do you remember any of these conversations. Recently, after worship during the fellowship, we had a conversation that I just can't seem to stop thinking about. The topic - snakes, yes, snakes. All kinds, the King Brown, the Red Belly Black, the Tiger Snake, and Death Adder to name them specifically. All can be found around here. Now, people who know me know I don't like snakes. But I learned a bit about them. I learned that they can be found in washing machines. I learned that "in the good ol' days" snakes were routinely shot. Now because of animal protection, people call have them them removed. So there were several stories about snake removal. I learned that the gas pipeline crew employs a snake handler to go ahead of the work crews and relocate the snakes. I learned that you can often tell if you have a snake around by listening to the frogs. Apparently, frogs make a very distressed sound when being eaten by a snake. I will be listening for that for sure. I also learned a few ways people keep snakes away. Apparently, if you drape the shade material used for shade sails around fences, snakes will get trapped like a net so that they can be removed before you happen across one accidently. I will not forget this conversation for some time.

Mental Health Week

2009-10-05T14:34:00.003+10:00

I got this joke from my family, that said they had heard that all the mentally ill were being deported and that they thought of me and said, "Run my crazy little friend! run!" I thought it was funny and forwarded to a friend of mine who also thought that it was funny. I think we thought it was funny because we feel a bit crazy sometimes (okay, many times). However, mental health is not a joke. I have family, friends and acquaintances that suffer from mental illness. This week in Australia is mental health awareness week and I encourage people to go along to activities in their communities to learn more about mental health. It should be a subject that we speak about as freely as breast cancer or seat belt safety. Mental health issues should not be deep dark secrets. We as a community should profess to support and pray for people we know with mental health issues the same as we support and pray for friends with other problem. No problem. Okay then.

"I see a branch of an almond tree"

2009-09-18T09:47:00.002+10:00

The word of the LORD came to me, saying, "Jeremiah, what do you see?" And I said, "I see a branch of an almond tree." Jer 1: 11 (NRSV) How often will your group start a study on Jeremiah then the next week one of the group says the almond tree is blooming let's have the study at our house. We did, and I saw the branch of an almond tree. With a mandarin tree in the background loaded to overflowing.

It is an amazing blessing to be a minister in the country. I look forward to the word of the LORD coming to me and the people that I minister to and with during our time here.

The locals

2009-08-18T15:29:00.006+10:00

Just of a couple of my neighbours!

Birdbath

2009-08-12T17:16:00.003+10:00

I have always wanted a birdbath in my yard. Who would have thought I would have to move to Roma, Queensland, Australia to have that want become a reality. We are settling into the "Uniting Church Manse" (that is what the sign next to the door says) and are very happy to be here. We have met some of our neighbours, a few of the local clergy and a few folk from two of the congregations and we have a birdbath in the back yard. It required a bit of maintenance which Mal quickly took to (just for me - I am not sure he considered it a priority) but I relax at the sink while I wash dishes and watch the birds come to drink and play. The birdbath probably represents a whole bunch of affirmations that we are just where God wants us to be. Praise be to God.

You can never go back!

2009-07-21T16:59:00.003+10:00

I am not the person I was 22 years ago. That may sound obvious however, there are differences that are subtle.

Today, I had the pleasure of worshiping in a church I had been a member of 22 years ago. I had told Mal that I really wanted to attend worship at this church because, I had many good memories there. My eldest daughter was baptized at this church.

We rocked up and there was a very familiar and comfortable place and and there were a few people who remembered me. They were so delighted to think that after so long someone would care enough and have loved them enough to come visit. They were even more delighted to learn that I would soon be a minister. It was heartwarming for them and me. I will keep in touch now.

During the experience, I recognized how this place and these people had been God’s agents in my life. I had grown in faith at that place in spite of myself.

This is how I know that I am not the same person. When I was here 22 or so years ago, I was young and loved adventure but was becoming insecure. I was white anting myself so to speak. I was wrong then. Feelings are feelings but feelings to not always reflect the truth. People saw the truth and demonstrated God’s love to me then and now. The difference, then I knew God loved me but struggled to love myself and accept that others loved me; now I think I am okay and can accept that okay is okay. I am also happy to accept that the people I met today really do love me and now Mal 22 years on.

I tell people all the time you can never go back. I went back physically because of circumstance but emotionally and spiritually went to a place an moved forward.

I wonder

2009-06-18T08:57:00.002+10:00

The other day, while traveling home on the bus, I saw a sign that had a name followed by "Legal Lawyers". I immediately began to wonder would the "illegal" lawyers put that fact on their sign and if not why would it be necessary to put "legal" on the sign.

Or is it that we cannot assume that lawyers deal with matters of law so therefore must describe them by another word, "legal", that we may or may not understand as having to do with law.

Most likely it is bad marketing and reminds me of being in places where English is the second language.

"Why Can't the English learn to speak?" Henry Higgins where are you?

cold

2009-06-12T12:39:00.003+10:00

This is sunny Queensland, Australia. Today is indeed sunny. But it is cold. This morning we woke up and it was 2 C; that is 35.5 F. Because this is sunny Queensland, we have no heating but the little oil heater that lives in the bathroom. So basically, the temperature outside is what we wake up to inside. It was cold.

The current temp is 18C which is about 65F. It is lovely. I have all the doors and windows open in order to absorb as much heat as possible to keep us warm in the predicted overnight low of 9C, a heat wave!

a poem

2009-05-23T09:42:00.002+10:00

Long ago in a land far away, I used to write poetry. I wrote one a couple of years ago and thought I should spend time with words in this way more often. We in The Gap have been swamped by rain, 18 inches in less than 48 hours. For many, not recovered from the last storm, this is disaster. For us, it just meant water in a wall from a roof leak, not repaired well or overflowed we are not sure. But there is water flowing everywhere. The results....

Rivers

coursing, surging

twisting

Rivers

raging, pushing

flooding

Rivers

Water

cool, refreshing

cleansing

Water

Rivers

flowing, lazy

floating

Rivers

Redeemed.

Defined by 3 M's

2009-05-21T20:24:00.002+10:00

So, I had a bit of leftover lite cream and I wanted to see if it would whip. For cream to whip well there needs to be a certain amount of fat. I need this information for the future so I won't buy this brand for whipping. Mal found the bowl with sort of whipped cream and asked what is this. I explained. To which, my friend Erin replied, wow, you are everything.

Minister

Mom

and Mad Scientist.

I thought that about sums it up.

I have been reading

2009-05-05T07:48:00.003+10:00

I know that I should be writing. But I have been reading. I am on the fourth book in the Ancient Practices Series. I finished reading Sabbath by Dan B. Allender and am nearly finished with Fasting by Scot McKnight. Mal is also reading the series.

The style of each book and author, I suppose is quite different. We have found all these book to be a bit challenging. There have been many opportunities for us to test out what we are being challenged about, in general, why are practices important to begin with and do they matter to our daily life. I have to answer a resounding yes.

I have been trying to figure Sabbath out for some time and this book was a terrific resource to do just that. As for Fasting, I have learned that I have not understood the purpose and motivation of fasting at all. Fasting as presented by McKnight makes much better sense.

Why do the practices make a difference? Well, I live and work in a world that is constantly trying to distract me from my joy. The more set I am in my practice the more difficult for the world to distract me from that the more complete and consistent is joy.

Uncommon

2009-04-11T17:57:00.002+10:00

The other night Mal and I commented on how uncourteous drivers have become. I said that there is no such thing as common courtesy so we must be uncommonly courteous. Mal said that also applies to common sense. The sense that seems common these days is not the sense that I would have my children use. So now I must teach my children to use their uncommon sense.....

Reflection on reflection

2009-03-14T16:20:00.004+10:00

Have I stopped reflecting? I seem to struggle to think of things to blog about. I know that I am busy and most of my writing is for college or work. When I began blogging, it seemed easy to pick up random thoughts and run with them a bit, however, now I don't seem to be able to concentrate on random thoughts. Just too busy. Busy is okay but ceasing to do reflection for me is not okay. It is important that I see God; that includes my daily life. Several times I have opened blogger only to close it again with no new post. So I have restarted my effort reflecting on the stoppage of reflection. I sense that it is simply a part of the rhythm of life. Sometimes, I will reflect more than at other times. It could be that my life is simply got boring.

Why God won't let me take myself too seriously - Part 4

2009-03-03T16:47:00.003+10:00

I rushed out of the house today. There had been a tradesman there replacing screens damaged by the storm, so I was late. I sprinted to the bus stop and 2 meters from the door of the bus, the driver closed the door and drove away. I couldn't believe it. So I hiked quickly to The Gap village about 10 mins to catch the express bus, grabbed a sushi on the way because it was soon to be lunch time and the exercise had made me hungry. Got to Milton for the eye exam that I was rushing to only to find out that the exam is next Tuesday. So I walked across the tracks to the college where the Triune God lecture is and sat for an hour waiting for the lecture to start. I would have time to get a sandwich and sit in comfort to eat which was the original plan but my hunger had driven me to wolf down a sushi on the run. Today is hot and humid and my blouse was soaking wet by the time I got to Milton not only because of the sprint but also because the express bus does not stop as close to my destination and there was a hike at the other end as well.

I tried to tell Mal that he needs to take better care of me but he insists I read the calendar all by myself.

Somehow dignity seems to be so elusive for me. I thought I was being smart booking the exam before the lecture because they are in the same area. Maybe next week it will seem to have been a smart thing. Next week, I will be early to the bus

Repent

2009-03-02T18:39:00.002+10:00

Mark 1:15 Jesus says, "The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God has come near; repent, and believe in the good news." The word repent caught my attention, in order to repent one has to accept responsibility for the error in the first place. They would have to acknowledge that they had made a mistake. Does this happen much any more, or is it everyone else's fault? How freeing it would be for most to simply say, "I'm sorry".

Have I offended? you bet I have - now I am sorry.

Home from Holidays

2009-02-20T17:29:00.003+10:00

Well believe it or not, we have nearly a gig of photos from our trip to the red centre of Australia. It was a great time for so many reasons. Mostly because God was there at every turn. In conversations and in quiet. So as a place to start, here is one of the awesome sights.

Travel is bad for my blog

2009-02-02T19:08:00.003+10:00

When I travel, I don't take time to blog. It is low on the priority list and catching up with people is high. I was recently in Guam and had a few interesting experiences that I thought I would log here. When I checked into the hotel, I was given a letter that explained that the cable TV would be experiencing outages while the company moved stuff. I thought that is okay, I don't watch much TV. Later that day, I finally paid the $10 US for one day (24 hours) of internet access to let Mal know I was there safe. Then the next morning when I tried to connect to internet nothing happened. I stopped at the front desk to say I didn't get 24 hours of access and the receptionist ask if I got the letter. I asked what letter, she said the letter that explained that the cable was out. I said, "Yes, I did and the internet runs through the cable, huh?" She affirmed that. The letter did not mention internet. Oh well, I should have known.

The next day, I got a letter from the hotel informing me that the next evening the city was shutting off the water overnight to repair a broken main down the street. The letter also said the hotel would continue to operate on reserve water supply. How many hotels have reserve water? The outage was to be from 22pm to 4am. Is 22pm a time? 2200 hours or 10 pm maybe?

Of course, the outage began on time when did water return? I don't know I left for work at 6:20am that is 0620 hours and there was no water then. I was thankful, I had showered at a friends house the night before.

Unlike other hotels in Guam, this hotel had a note that it cost $.75 to make a local phone call. I thought no problem there are two pay phones next to the elevator in the lobby for $.25 . I stopped on the way to make a local call, dialed the number then when instructed to insert a quarter, put a quarter into the slot. The first phone would not take a quarter or any other currency for that matter. The second phone just let the money go through the phone into the change slot. So, I paid $.75 for local calls.

I think there was a little earth quake on Saturday night at 7 pm. It had to be little but I was on the 11th floor.

On Sunday morning there was a drunk in the parking lot, sitting on the ground with his head in the drivers seat of his car. His windshield wipers were running but the car was not. I tried to inform hotel security but they were suddenly no where to be found. Most days, there were two or three of them hanging around.

There were more Guam stories but I have forgotten.

On the flip side. The weather was wonderful. I enjoy catching up with people and overall the work was good.

I will not blog again for about 3 weeks as I am taking my Dad to the red center of Australia. Will bring you photos.

We change

2009-01-12T08:40:00.004+10:00

As time passes we change. My tastes have changed in food and in fashion as I have aged. But also my sporting interests have changed. After I moved to Australia, I found it difficult to watch Sunday football (Grid iron to Australians) because it comes on Monday mornings and I am at college on Monday mornings. So I thought it prudent to begin to learn about some of the sports my husband enjoys. Out of the many choices of sport, my husband follows AFL and the Brisbane Lions a bit and he follows Australian Cricket.

As Mal is a patient man, he was able to answer my plethora of questions until now I can understand both games, but, I really enjoy cricket the most.

I had the privilege of attending the Boxing day test at the MCG which was an extremely cool experience. And now that the test series is over between Australia and South Africa, they play one day matches and a variation called 20/20. This is a much different strategy to the same game and is very exciting to watch.

So why to I enjoy cricket. First I think I learned to enjoy sport because my brothers are extremely athletic and I have the hand eye coordination of a sheep. I learned by watching to appreciate what they could do so easily and I could not.

Cricket is a game of amazing thought and athleticism. Last night, I watched a young man, J. P. Duminy, hit this amazing shot. Unlike baseball you hit the ball hard, in cricket there is a bit of finesse and you can hit the ball in any direction. Cricketers also hit the ball off a bounce unlike baseball. Young Duminy stepped to the side of the crease as a bounced and got his bat under the ball and launched it over his head to the boundary behind him. It was amazing. Australia won the game but both teams are very good (S. Africa won the test series).

Have changed interests or have I just redirected an admiration? Am I just getting a bigger view of the talents that God created in man? Adding breadth to my contextual library? Or is cricket just a reeeallly great game?

2009

2009-01-06T06:48:00.006+10:00

Happy New Year. I realize that we are almost a week into this year but it has been busy already. Mal is away already for work. I am trying to get some study done to lighten the load for next semester. Yesterday, I spent some time hanging out with a friend who is going on a mission trip to Africa and have also spent some time with another friend who is bunking at our house on her holiday. Then my two girls came and all of us went to Ikea and I bought curtains.

Later my daughters' husbands came over and we watched movies and ate pizza. It was a great day except for Mal missing. While we were eating and watching, the whole house began to glow golden and even though no one could see the actual sunset (I have no west facing windows in the living room) everyone commented on how beautiful the sunset was. They could see the golden glow through all the other windows. I went out to actually see the sunset then came back for my camera.

I really felt that all creation was calling to my soul to join in proclaiming the greatness of God. Below is a photo of the sunset. You can decide for yourself, as for me - God is truly Great!

Down under

2008-12-23T10:53:00.004+10:00

It is Christmas. My rose bushes are blooming. Yes, roses for Christmas. It seems somewhat odd to me. I grew up in the northern hemisphere, where Christmas is nestled neatly into the cold and snow. Perhaps, it is not so in America's south but where I grew up Christmas is cold. This year, I have trimmed my tree and cut roses for the dining table. After Christmas, we will go to the cricket. I really mean, "the" cricket, as we will go to the MCG (Melbourne Cricket Ground) for the Boxing Day (the day after Christmas) test match. There is a bat and ball so my American friends might think of it as a sport like baseball (although not at all like baseball) in December. But remember, it is not cold it is summer here, the roses are blooming and the game is on.

Prayers for you and your family though this blessed time when we remember God's gift to the world and anticipate Christ's coming into the world.

Merry Christmas to all!

Don't ask why

2008-12-15T10:42:00.006+10:00

I love the outdoors. Last week, Mal and I were in North Queensland, Etty beach near Innisfail to be exact. There I watch a Cassowary and baby, they are fascinating. There was a man above the retaining wall trying to scare them away. He was a safe distance as the parent was over a meter (bit more than a yard) tall. He said that they are not too smart. They actually look a bit dinosaur to me with the horn and all. Don't ask why they have a horn.

Then at the beach in the wet sand were many beads of sand push out of holes by mini crabs.

The beads made beautiful patterns on the beach. They seemed to be star-shaped patterns but were probably quite random. Don't ask why they made pretty patterns.

These are things I don't know, I just observe. I have to admit, I have lots of observations and don't really know anything about them. Sometimes, I wager a guess. Sometimes, maybe divine inspiration gives me knowledge. A lot, I just don't know. God knows and most of the time that is good enough for me.

Weddings are a big deal

2008-12-08T08:14:00.003+10:00

The wedding was Saturday and I am still a bit tired. Yesterday, I literally just showed up at things there was not much thinking or anything; but I was there. The wedding was a lot of fun and went very well. It was all beautiful. So why am I so tired? Mia and Sam did almost everything (Mal and I and Sam's parents did fork out dough) but the work was done by a determined young couple. I think Deb support Mia a lot as only sisters can do. And Sam's mom recycled a dress for Mia. But I am tired. I didn't sleep much on Friday night, that is because my girls didn't sleep. So I am sure that contributes. I imagine my tired is because I put all my emotion and spirit into wanting their wedding to be perfect and not getting in their way. I am so glad for them that this is behind them and they can press forward into the world and life ahead of them. Mia n Sam - if your watching, I love you both and pray that you have a wonderful trip. I can't wait till you get back to hear all about it. Take lots of photos!

Keep Watch

2008-12-03T09:17:00.003+10:00

There is a wedding dress hanging from my balcony in the middle of my living room. The dress has been carefully ironed and hangs high so that it will not get crushed in a closet. It is covered with a sheet to keep it clean. I feel pretty sure that all the details for my daughter's wedding on Saturday have been addressed. I am just keeping watch, trimmed the lamps, have plenty of oil, but I know the hour of the wedding.

Today, I will put up our Christmas tree (meant to have the done already :) in preparation for Christmas. I have some gifts to put under the tree so am just about ready for Christmas day. But there is more than celebrating that Christ came. I expect the Lord's return though I don't know the hour. Sometimes I forget that he is coming and have my life busy and so full already that there would scarcely be time for that appointed day. I plan to take some time, this Christmas to be ready too for the advent (coming) of the Lord. I am not sure really how to do that but I imagine it like getting ready for my girl's wedding. I sat and listened to what they wanted then worked my heart out to make that happen for them because I love them so. I will take some time to listen to what God wants then with all my heart make it happen. I will let you know how that goes.....

Twisted

2008-11-24T09:19:00.003+10:00

We have a pine tree in our yard. In a few months, the tree will provide pine nuts for the local parrots.

This tree is normally a near perfectly round, ornamental tree. But the storm has changed the tree's orientation.

Over a year ago, I had the opportunity to take a trauma ministry workshop run by the US military chaplains. The context they used was, of course, military; however, the information presented was easily extracted and put into any trauma situation.

One point made was that trauma can twist an individual's view of God. We were then given some tools to help correct that. Step one - make sure my orientation didn't get twisted.

Update

2008-11-21T11:35:00.003+10:00

Well, huge orange tarps cover our roof and overall they are doing a wonderful job. Mother Nature, however, is severely challenging Mals ability to be a good steward of the nice home God has blesses us with. Every day is hot and humid and every afternoon more thunderstorms, wind, rain and in some places hail, so every morning Mal gets up and resets the tarps from where the wind has moved them to where the need to be. Every evening storm leaves Mal pacing exclaiming that he can't believe the wind has moved the tarps again. I am also amazed because the tarps are not only roped down but are actually bolted to the brick walls of the house. But for the most part the tarps are doing what they should be doing. UPDATE: The SES have just come to check tarps after last night's wind and offered Mal a job with North Queensland crew. He will be chuffed.

In addition to all our goings and comings, our house has been a staging area for food and water distribution. There has been, I don't know how many people or how much food go through our house into the community for families and workers.

My washing machine only gets about 8 hours rest a day, the same as the rest of us.

On Wed the storm that came through made Mal's daughter Sally a victim as well. Her unit sits above the garage and is near a creek. The storm washed all the debris down the creek to a bridge where it flooded and filled Sally's garages with nearly a meter of water and mud. She lost much of the stuff she had stored in the garage. Every storm brings more damage to more communities all around. Flooding is happening all over the country.

The neighbourhoods are for the most part travel-able so on the outside things appear quite normal but I know that inside homes people are still reeling. There is subtle damage. Our neighbour and friend died suddenly on Wed. He was elderly so you can't really say that it was storm damage but it leaves you wondering.

Thank you everyone for your prayers and support. We (our whole community) will soon be back on its feet because of your response.

Red Cross

2008-11-19T16:54:00.002+10:00

I was not ready for the Red Cross to knock on my door. Mal and I are doers. I can't think that I have ever received much of anything but prayers and comfort, maybe a meal at anytime. But today the Red Cross came to help us. Our roof only has Mal's plastic patches and more storms are on the way. We have been offered tarps and financial assistance. The same as all our neighbours have received. And we took them up on the tarp offer. It is a necessity. I was impressed by the effort of a volunteer who explained how to identify bad stress and where to go for help. There are 600 or so Army men helping out down our street. There are volunteers from other states. The Prime Minister has been here and declared it a National Disaster area and we are to receive federal aid at some stage. Our house was a staging area for the church to provide lunch to volunteers. It hadn't occurred that we are also part of the disaster. Thank you all who support the Red Cross. God Bless you.

More Storm Damage

2008-11-18T08:34:00.001+10:00

Thought I'd share a link with information about our church.
Link

Storm 2008

2008-11-17T18:20:00.005+10:00

Well, we were in a bad storm. Mal was away but came home because of it. The damage in our suburb is some of the worst I have ever seen. The wind has blown off roofs, blown trees into cars and into houses. Our roof no longer sheds water the way it should. There is water in our walls. Mal has repaired it so to speak but the repairs will not last long if the wind blows again. The view of the park we had has changed. The tall big gum trees are all gone, nothing but a fraction of the size they used to be. Most of them left standing will not recover. This has been a sobering experience. I had a quick trip to college and Brisbane city was about its daily Monday business and seemed to not even know that an entire suburb had been flattened. Wow.

PS: We are all fine.

Post Marks

2008-11-11T11:51:00.003+10:00

Why does so much of the mail that I receive from the US have postmarks from Europe? This recently received letter was stamped in Zurich, Switzerland. Previous letters marked in Munich. I wonder....

The Game

2008-11-04T07:35:00.002+10:00

If you visited the Journey site, I linked to in the last blog (even if only to check if I was really published), you would have seen the headlines of the November issue is “worship wars”. So here it is, the long awaited position of Linda on music in worship.

Think of it like this.

There is this soccer team right, each player on the team has his own personal ball. They may have gotten this ball as a gift from a loving parent when they were very little. This young person played with the ball with parents, neighborhood friends, cousins probably played with anyone. The purpose of this play was probably just for fun but the result was developing skills. This young person then joins a team, like their-self, all the other players on the team have their own personal ball. All of them bring their own balls to practice. They move each others balls between them in drills, often repetitive, honing each skills individually. As they get better, the coach comes along and introduces more skills. Then they have a practice game, all the players on the team set their individual balls aside and use a ball that the coach has selected. This ball may be a worn game ball but the standard will be consistent with regulations, unlike each individual ball which could have a variance in standard, not enough variance that it impedes the development of skill but varied none the less. All the while, this player continues to practice with his ball at home or he won’t get to play in the big game. When it comes to game day, the ball is a regulation ball.

Now, how would the team go if everyone tried to play the game with their own ball that they brought from home. Chaos, Or, how would it be if even if all the players left their ball on the sidelines and ran around chasing the ball on the field yelling, “My ball!” Again, I think the individual’s focus on the ball being theirs and what that means to them, well, destroys the team.

I see worship sort of like this. I individually know God, received faith as a gift from no other than God, Godself. I use this individual faith at home, I practice it; challenging every day events with the gift that God has given. But, eventually, I realize that this is not only fun at home, there can be more and I join a team. In that team’s study group, I bounce around my gift, and experience skill building with it and with the gifts that others have, their own personal gifts. I hone my discipleship. Sometimes, by repetitive drills, doing them over and over again. Sometimes, it is not for my sake but I am forces to repeat them because someone on my team needs more practice with that skill. Sometimes they repeat things for me. This is done under the watchful eye of a spiritual leader, one who knows the game, knows the big picture, one who continues to practice theirs skills and their skills should be evident. Occasionally, the spiritual director will call all the members of the team together and have practice games, carefully choosing the gift for that game. All the while, I continue to use my gift in my daily life. But,then on Sunday morning or evening (or perhaps some other day), it is the game, worship. God is there. The God who gave all the gifts, he comes to watch his children demonstrate their use of the gift in worship. This brings glory to him.

What if we all bring our own ball into this event and focus on it? What if we focus on God and sing out, “My, my, my” (like the bunch of sea gulls in Finding Nemo)? Shouldn’t for that time, we give ourselves fully to be part of the team and for that time shouldn’t we sing, “Our?”

I get so frustrated with the argument that God is personal and if we only sing, “We, us and our” in worship people will not take responsibility for their own faith. Rubbish. Join the team, play the game, on game day worship our God and then take your gift home and enjoy.

I am published!

2008-10-30T18:13:00.002+10:00

I have had my first book review published in Journey the Uniting Church Queensland Synod magazine. The article appears in the November 2008 issue.

The editors deleted a sentence, I suppose to make it fit the space, so I include the review here in its entirety.

What Have They Done With Jesus? Beyond Strange Theories and Bad History

By Ben Witherington III

Monarch Books

RRP $24.95

This is a book for anyone who has been confused by or is interested in all the theories of Jesus’ life and relationships. Ben Witherington sifts through many theories, rumors, historical documents and the Bible to determine what they reveal about Jesus.

I found this book not only easy to read but delightfully insightful and compelling. Ben does not adopt a view that extra-Biblical material should be rejected outright but reads the documents in their historical context to extract what they contribute to our understanding of who Jesus was. He not only discusses issues around Jesus identity but also delves into his relationships.

Ben is clear about where each idea comes from. He presents each idea from its own context and allows the reader to make up his own mind. He is also clear about when he is offering his interpretation and assumptions.

The introduction of the book has a description of American culture in relation to his reason for writing the book. I found for the most part that his explanation sits with the Australian culture but it still leaves the reader to make his own determination which is probably a good thing. The book however quickly sets aside our culture and looks to answer the question, “What have they done with Jesus?”

Caught out by compassion

2008-10-24T11:30:00.002+10:00

My own. I have a tendency to be a heart person, though over the years I have learned to balance head and heart and operate in a reasonable manner. But last night the heart took over. I was tired and have had a serious cold for two weeks and had the head operated at all, there would have been a different outcome. That is not to say that this outcome is bad and the other better just that it would have been different.

I was at the airport in Guam ready to board my plane to Australia. When they announced that the plane was overbooked and are there any volunteers to stay back. I did not respond and noticed no one else did either. As I was pacing, as is my custom before getting on a plane to sit for the next 4 hours, I happened by the counter and one agent ask the senior agent, “What happens if no one volunteers?” The senior responded, “I have already arbitrarily picked people to stay back.”

My heart was in action; how would I feel if I were one of the people arbitrarily picked? I have witnessed this scenario. People at the desk, upset, saying, “What do you mean I can’t board, I have a boarding pass. I paid for my seat....” I knew that is what I would say.

My next thought was, how can I get on board knowing that my inaction put someone in that position? I, of course, would feel bad. The only pressure, I had was that my husband who I hadn’t seen in a week would be waiting. And so driven by compassion for a person that didn’t even exist yet, I stepped up to the desk and asked if I volunteered what would happen and could I call my husband before I commit.

I found very supportive and efficient staff. They were on the phone immediately to work out connections. After they were sure, I had good connections home they told me what would happen. Then handed me a cell phone (not a mobile phone remember I am in Guam) so that I could call Mal. I explained and although he was disappoint he agreed. He too is compassionate.

So, I stayed over in Guam and will later catch a flight through Japan to Brisbane. It is longer but better because I will not be disrupted by getting gear off the plane at midnight and making my way to a hotel. I can settle on the plane and sleep through. Plus, I will start the trip not so tired.

But had the head worked at all, I would have told the agent that I would volunteer, if the people he had selected really needed to get to Australia (more than I did). As it turned out the people he chose were on a connecting flight with a tight connection. And one of them was happy to stay back and his sense of adventure pressured the other to not complain. The person who took my seat was like me, I want to get there but guess I could stay back. So there was no upset person demanding to board. I would not have had to feel guilty for getting on and leaving people behind.

But this outcome was not all bad. I called a friend here who joined me for breakfast and we had some good laughs. I only get home 19 hours behind my original flight and I may be more comfortable in the end. Plus, this beautiful view God made for me.

Also, I learned that when sick and tired and alone, I am a heart. Much different when I am sick and tired and with my husband; because then it is about me and not others (including Mal). I need a bit of balance in this area maybe.?!

Why God won't let me take myself too seriously - Part 3

2008-10-08T07:49:00.003+10:00

Well, Mal and I walked to church on Sunday. It was a glorious morning. After worship, we walked home. We are maybe a kilometer from the church, following a bike/pedestrian walk that follows the creek.

On the walk home, Mal and I are chatting and enjoying the time together, when suddenly, there was a sound a few feet behind me. This noise I can best describe as a crunch of dry leaves. At the sound of this unidentified, possibly life threatening noise, I instantly grabbed Mal's wrist, death grip, might be an appropriate description and I moved with lightening speed to a place in front of him where in the next instant, I would be able to thrust him between me and danger as some sort of human shield. In that same instant, in my hyper awareness, I spotted the source of the unexpected noise. You guessed it. A bike.

Why, you ask is a cyclist not expected on a bike path? Well, I can only imagine that I was so enthralled with the beauty of the day and time with my husband that I had no realization that the rest of the world was there. Maybe not. Anyway, I started to howl with laughter. Mal, then, asked if I would release his hand, he said something about blood needing to circulate. I complied and continued to laugh.

Later, when relating the story to my daughter and her husband, John asked, what kind of training have I had that would elicit such an immediate and perhaps, unthinkably, an important response. Was it the military? I don't think so. I blame living on the ranch with my brothers who had nothing better to do than to scare (frighten silly, actually) their sister at any opportunity. I think now it is a response that would buy the precious time needed to decide, "Fly or Fight".

Mal and I grinned the rest of the day, as we recalled, how I was so willing to sacrifice him to protect me. Funny, huh?

Last night I watched a movie

2008-10-03T13:59:00.004+10:00

Last night a friend came over with a movie that we are going to show at church. Our intention was to watch it and put together discussion questions. The movie is As it is in Heaven . A film from 2004 from Sweden. What a fantastic film.! After I wiped away tears at the end, I could only think of one question. My friend was better off as this was the third time she watched it. I don't like watching movies that will make me cry, my kids know this and I guess I didn't know that it was a tear jerker before I started.

So what's this movie about you ask? Well, you will just have to watch but I will tell you there are strong points of connection with real life throughout the whole movie. And how does it end, well, As it is in Heaven, I guess.

I am really looking forward to watching this with my family.

2002

2008-09-25T16:25:00.002+10:00

Most people can remember where they were at particular moments in the past. Mal and I were just musing about where we were in 2002. Since I am not good at keeping a journal, I thought that I would put those memories here.

At the beginning of '02 Mal and I were both living in Guam. We were married on May 15th. Then, immediately proceeded to process the immigration paperwork for our entry into Australia. I was projected to attend an USAF training school at the end of June until August. So I resigned from work, my girls and I scaled down all our belonging into I think 11 suitcases or boxes. Basically, we shed most everything and travelled to Australia on a visitors visa. Just days before typhoon Chataan (will check the spelling) hit Guam. Note here people in Guam mark time by typhoon names.

We spent a few days in our new home then traveled to the US. Deb and Mia went to Grampa's in South Dakota and I went on to school in Texas. Mal joined me there after a few weeks. At then end of the school, Mal and I travelled to South Dakota on different airlines because the travel agent messed up but we both got there. The girls and I had to wait until our visas were processed before we could return to Australia. Mal went off to Western Samoa for work. Mal had faith in the visa process and purchased the girls' and my tickets to Australia for mid-Sept. Mal did email the consulate and tell them that we would just happen to be in LA mid-Sept could we get our visa. The answer came a couple of weeks later, yes. We were off.

Before, I left South Dakota, my grandmother age 94 was diagnosed with terminal cancer. She said, "Well you have to die of something." My Dad's sister was very tired and crabby and suffering from pain in her shoulder. We thought it stress from Gramma's impending death.

While in Samoa, Mal broke his wrist, playing a friendly game of soccer. Mal, they were younger and probably bigger than you! He came back to Australia a week later had his wrist re-broken and cast properly and all has been well.

Not long after getting to Australia, my Aunt was also diagnosed with terminal cancer. Bummer, I was never to see her again and she had done a lot to raise me because my mother was sick.

Then in November, my Gramma past away. I was in Cairns and started planning to come home for the funeral. My Dad asked if I wanted to come to Gramma's funeral or my Aunt's. He said she will die soon. After an agonizing few hours, I called Dad and said I would wait. Two weeks later my Aunt died and I made flights home.

The church we attended every year about this time held a beach camp for young adults. Mal and I were to lead one of the sessions during the week. A lesson called "Hanging tough with change", do ya think we were qualified?!

My trip to the US meant that I would miss the first day of camp but I got my girl's to pack for me. Mal then too missed most of the camp, because while I was in the US typhoon Pongsonga (I will check spelling) hit Guam and caused a major fire. Mal was flown as part of the response team. Deb also packed his bag as he left 2 hours after the call and was at the doctor.

I flew home only to realize that I was locked out of my house. After a good cry. I remembered Mal had a hidden key and got in. Threw some things together and got picked up to go to camp. Mal returned on the last day of the camp. I knew very few people so it was an experience. Probably good in retrospect because people got to know me as me not as Mal's wife.

We then returned home for a couple of weeks and the four of us Mal and girls and I, left for 4 weeks in Samoa. I was ready for this because life for an American in Australia was very tough at the time. Australians were blaming Americans for sending their troops to Iraq. I didn't mind catching flack most of the time but when people started pointing on my daughters, too young to vote, and abuse them for send troops and being war mongers. I had enough. Thank God for work in Samoa.

Mal and I chatted about these memories last night because, he has sent in a resume for more work in Samoa. I was remembering walking down the street almost every evening for ice cream, swimming (really, watching Mal and the girls swim as I was only just learning). a New Year's eve dance at the hotel, and scrapbooking withe the girls. It was good. Mal reminded me that we had a big fight while there. It was our first, his nationalism took on mine and neither of us came out much better for it.

I may also note that between the end of the camp and the trip to Samoa, I got drunk. I didn't mean to I was having a wine with Mal's daughter and next thing I remember, I was, well sick. Not a fine moment but I remember telling Mal's daughter about my Aunt and Gramma and well. I guess, I was mourning.

There was more and Mal may comment with his memories but it was a "full on" year.

Motivation

2008-09-17T10:31:00.005+10:00

I am motivated to lead a study on spiritual types at our church. I am motivated to work on my Gospel of Mark assignment. I am motivated to work on my Mission of the Church assignment. I am motivated to do my yard work and house keeping. Sounds good doesn't it. The problem is the next assignment due is Humanity, Sin and Grace and I am not motivated to work on that. Procrastination has set in and I would rather work on all those other things. I am happy that other things are getting done but soon, very soon, I am going to have to come up with about 3000 words assessing an academic's arguments on humanity and God for coherence. They were coherent, now where to the other words come from? Why am I happy to engage in the lectures, reading and topic but not the assignment? Why is this the only subject, that I am not motivated to finish? Motivation seems to be as slippery topic as say, well, grace (update) that is understanding grace.

Water

2008-09-10T11:01:00.002+10:00

Water is hugely important to life. Because drought has been long-lasting in our part of the world Mal and I have installed rainwater tanks at our townhouse. 10,000 litres worth to be exact. These tanks will be used to water the garden, wash the car, clean house and flush toilets. The whole house can be connected to the tanks and Mal estimates at our present usage would last us 80 days. Then, we would be out of water.

Water theft has already begun to happen here. I was told by a friend there that water was stolen from the tanks and swimming pool at the Australian Catholic University. Right now greed, I imagine was the motivation but are we moving toward days when need will drive such actions?

I wonder.....

What you mean to me

2008-09-02T17:27:00.004+10:00

Again, this place has been neglected. I had a two week trip away and even though I had the technology to continue to post reflections here I didn't. Time just seemed to slip away and when there was a bit of time, I was simply too tired.

I realize that this is how I treat probably a lot of my relationships. I usually call my Dad every week but while I was gone, did not. Many friends, I only catch up with once in a blue moon. I am not totally to blame for this because they are busy too. But I don't think relationships should be catch as catch can. They are far too important.

From the notes of today's "Humanity, Sin and Grace" lecture, "Human beings who are created in the image of the triune God will find that image realized - proleptically - in the unity and diversity of the life of the church. It is in that community that the desire for unity and completeness is expressed with respect to both other humans and to God. "(Summary of Stanley Grenz, The Social God and Relational Self)

I have always place an emphasis on relationships. Partly because I am an extrovert but also because I believe them to be priority. I may not have had a theological reason years ago but intuitively knew it to be so. You might say over the years, I had been formed that way. And now find that others read the Bible that way too.

So my dear readers, I apologize for treating this different sort of relationship (blogging) casually and will endeavour to keep in contact. Please forgive me when I fail.

Discernment

2008-08-13T09:06:00.003+10:00

Discernment, divine insight or experiential guess-work? Answer: Yes.

Over the years, I have found that I catalogue peoples responses to particular situations by possible motivations. My kids also know that I provide human commentary to animal antics that we observe in our yard but that is another story. My library of experience, is not only full of Psych 101 type observations (people who respond with anger may be responding because of underlying fear or pain) but is primarily full of my reflections on my own responses, why did I say or do what I did? I also have been privileged to walk with individuals in their difficult times and have been privy to their reflections. All added to my library of possibilities, a library that I seem to draw on more these days. While I thank God continually for these experiences and the gift of being able to catalogue the events for quick retrieval, I recognize that my library has significant limitations. Its use can be based on the assumption that most people respond similarly thus the recognition of the library's name becomes important; it is just "guess-work". So many times my library lets me down, I am lost for a response. It is at those humbling moments when God's glory shines. God love for the individual I interact with stops me from saying something unhelpful and before I can think the most perfect words have come from my mouth. Not words of idle commentary or of "guess-work" but words a gift from God for God's people, divine insight.

I light of my conversation about ordination, I see this as another demonstration of God's faithfulness to his people. The ordained are set apart because they have gifts that point to God; gifts the Church can recognize. One of those gifts for me - discernment. Praise be to God.

Ordination

2008-08-06T09:17:00.001+10:00

What an awesome God. Over the centuries he has faithfully provided leadership for his church. I think the fact that there is such continuity is overlooked by many. Below is a bit of para 14 of the Basis of Union. It says the Church bears witness to God’s faithfulness and declares the hope by which it lives; however, this is reflected through the participation of the ordained.

In this act of ordination the Church praises the ascended Christ for conferring gifts upon men and women. It recognises Christ's call of the individual to be his minister; it prays for the enabling power of the Holy Spirit to equip the minister for that service. By the participation in the act of ordination of those already ordained, the Church bears witness to God's faithfulness and declares the hope by which it lives.

The Basis goes on to say

In company with other Christians the Uniting Church will seek for a renewed understanding of the way in which the congregation participates in ordination and of the significance of ordination in the life of the Church.

The understanding of ordination to the life of the Church and the congregations participation, well, it seems at the time of union (1977) was highlighted for more discussion.

In my discussions with ordained about ordination, I find that they by in large are in awe of God’s faithfulness to the church. But, in my last discussion, there was a comment along the lines that in ordination the Church recognizes gifts of leadership (and others). But this bothered me, somehow so later in the conversation, I asked, “The Church recognizes leadership but do congregations?” My friend commented that he found many congregations that think of the ordained as some sort of “Divine polyfiller” that comes in and fills up all the gaps and needs.

I recognize that a congregation is a place that many arrive at spiritually empty and perhaps, it may be a bit much to expect more from them but I hope that my ordination service will point to God’s faithfulness and bring hope to the congregation as well as all the things identified above.

Why Mal can't take himself too seriously either

2008-07-29T14:55:00.004+10:00

Mal writes - Prior to leaving Bris there were some issues.

I forgot my belt – okay with these trousers but not sure about others – can buy a belt if I need it.
I printed my boarding pass last night as you know. It would not read this morning when I checked my bags in – so the lady said I will print you another in case this doesn’t read at the gate.
She did, put it in a folder with the baggage check and off I went to Q club.
At Qantas club I was greeted with “Oh would you prefer to go to the Captain’s lounge opposite gate 23 sir?”. I looked at the time thinking, what entitles me to those lounges, “Oh maybe Silver status” but didn’t think any more of it. Went into the Bus lounge (new and part of the original Q club lounge now but separated).
Went off down to gate when called, was first in line. Hostie greeted me with “Oh this is the Gladstone flight sir, not Darwin”. She handed back the pass and it was for Mr (Another) Hamill in seat 23A going to Darwin.. When I said I was on the Gladstone flight she asked me to go to the other counter.
I did, they explained the new computer system had some bugs and they were running the old and the new side-by-side. Got my original 3A seat allocation back and went back to the line. Then thought, “I bet my port is on the way to Darwin!!”. Got the folder with baggage tag attached and yup – Darwin bound.
Pulled out of line and back to counter. They called baggage to see if they could get my bag pulled and onto the Gladstone. Line for Gladstone flight was now empty – they asked me to board and that if the bag didn’t arrive then they would get it on the 8.30am flight and deliver it to me in Gladstone.
So got to Gladstone and my bag arrived – about the third one off.

Linda writes - the lesson.... look at the name on the boarding pass and take the offer to Captains club. :-)

The questions are....

2008-07-22T19:51:00.002+10:00

1. The question for the semester is "What do you think ordination is/means?"

I will spend the semester exploring this and hope to post periodically on this subject. I will let you know what I come up with for me at the end of the semester.

2. The question for this week is "What does it mean for you to be a human person?"

Yup, only a week to figure this one out.

I would love to know that you think.

Ecumenical

2008-07-19T09:54:00.001+10:00

As a young person, I recognized that I was formed by several denominational traditions. I was baptized in the Presbyterian Church not that I remember much of that but throughout the years when we worship with my Gramma it was at the same church that I was baptized in so I imagine there was formation there. My church memories begin in the Isabel United Church of Christ (UCC), however, we were a rural community and ministry among churches was shared so these early memories of the UCC were influenced by the Methodist minister serving there. I was confirmed into the UCC by United Methodist minister. As I became an adult, I found myself drawn to the Methodist church because it was most familiar; fancy that. After the Methodist minister moved on the UCC was served by a Lutheran minister so much of my youth camp experience was Lutheran. This does not include Vacation Bible School (VBS) that we attended every year with my cousins. VBS was run jointly by an Assembly of God and a Lutheran Church. It was at the Assembly of God church that I made a commitment to Christ, whatever that meant to a 9-10 year old.

My ecumenical formation continues. My supervisor, for a few months while I was in field placement at the Lutheran Church of Guam, was Brad Boydston. He introduced me to lots of people (through blogs) from the Evangelical Covenant Church.

I attended lectures on Old Testament Law by Terence Fretheim, Lutheran.

I had the opportunity to listen and speak to Bishop Nazir-Ali, Anglican (see post).

I recently attended lectures on the Spirituality of Mark by Bill Countryman, Episcopalian.

As well as, formation from all my lectures by the local Uniting Church of Australia, Anglican and Catholic lecturers who are part of the Brisbane College of Theology.

I am in formation with the Uniting Church of Australia and am committed to the Basis of Union. There is no doubt in my mind that I am where God wants me to be. Yet I find it extremely interesting that my formation has been and is still so ecumenical. What a blessing!

Vacation

2008-07-09T16:08:00.005+10:00

Dear Readers,

Thank you for sticking with my blog even though I haven't posted for a while. I have been on vacation and just arrived home today. The attached photo was one of the highlights. The 4th of July fireworks (actually held on the 3rd) at Mount Rushmore, South Dakota were spectacular. I told Mal that I would never need to see fireworks again. I am not sure any will top it. The day was glorious - good thing too because we got there about 9 am and the show was not until 9:15 pm. We were early because the parking fills up by 10 am and the closest parking additional parking means a 2 mile jaunt up the mountain. There were activities all day and we had a group of people. Mal's daughter and family came from Florida, friends from Washington state, my brother and family from Florida and of course my family including my daughter's and their partners were amongst the gathered.

The best part of the holiday though was all the people that we caught up with. While there was fireworks of the spectacular kind; the trip really was about people who are very important to me. I love them so and now that I am home in Brisbane, I wish the trip had been a bit longer (usually, I am ready to come home). This trip was many people and too little time. I pray that I will get to see them all soon again.

But since the semester is starting again, I imagine I will blog more frequently.

Book Review

2008-05-31T11:04:00.001+10:00

This is my first ever book review. I have recently finished reading Christianity’s Dangerous Idea: The Protestant Revolution - A History from the Sixteenth Century to the Twenty-First by Alister McGrath. While I enjoy history, I never seem to have much time to delve into church history much less any other history. The books and articles that I read these days must apply to what I am doing.

This book was tremendous. It made history relevant. It is not a dictionary of events or people of the reformation rather it tracks the ideas of the reformation through history to the present day.

The book follows issues like images and music in worship through historical opinions. It tackles the question of our multiplicity of Protestant denominations; how and why they occurred and traces many to their roots in the reformation.

McGrath looks to the future and helps the reader get a sense of not only where we have been as church but also where we may go.

If you are looking for a timeline of facts and dates, this is not it. If you are looking for a book that reads like a novel tracing the changes, subtle and drastic, of reformation ideals like they were characters in real life, well then this is it.

Why God won't let me take myself too seriously Part 2

2008-05-19T17:36:00.003+10:00

Okay, today, I got to college early so I stopped by the coffee shop for a coffee and a ticket for the lunch meal. The cost was of course was not even dollars and I told the clerk that I had the change. So he held out his hand for my coins. I took them out of my coin purse, reached my hand directly over his and open my fingers for the coins to drop into his hand. But no. One coin stuck to my finger and flung itself into a cup of coffee with a splash. No, not my coffee. The clerk stood there and kept giggling. I could not have hit the coffee if I had tried. I offered another coin the the clerk now in hardy laughter said "no worries" he would get it out later.

The person standing behind me in line comments on how much coffee splash out and asked if I could do that again.

Yes, this is the lifestyle of the not so rich or famous.

Movie Review

2008-05-15T10:20:00.003+10:00

Mal and I and a few from our college went to see "The End of a Spear" on Monday night. We really enjoyed the movie based on the true story of some missionary families. I think for me it raised my awareness of the amazing love of God for all his creation. I wonder at the conviction of men to risk their lives for a few unknown people. I am in awe at the faith of the women to continue after such loss.

I remember when I saw the documentary that this movie is based on I cried for my children. I do not know what kind of unfriendly world they are entering. And I prayed that no matter what they faced that they would be faithful. This movie, I wondered where my convictions will take me. Minister of the Word in Australia looks easy by comparison, doesn't it?

I thought wrong

2008-05-06T15:27:00.005+10:00

I thought I would not like reading Calvin. I was wrong. There are bits I am uncomfortable with but there is so much good.

For example Institutes 1.6.1

God therefore bestows a gift of singular value, when, for the instruction of the Church, he employs not dumb teachers merely, but opens his own sacred mouth; when he not only proclaims that some God must be worshipped, but at the same time declares that He is the God to whom worship is due; when he not only teaches his elect to have respect to God, but manifests himself as the God to whom this respect should be paid.

Interesting that since 1559 or something like that it hasn't changed God still informs people that they should worship God as opposed to everything else and that He is indeed God. Deut 6:4 Hear O Israel: The LORD is our GOD, the LORD alone!

Will we ever get it.....

Don't look back

2008-05-03T10:24:00.003+10:00

I was commuting home from university the other day. I take the train from uni then transfer to a bus when I get into the city. This particular day, I got off the train in rush hour and had made my way off the platform and through the terminal. During rush hour there are young people handing out a news magazine. They are at every platform and at the entrance to the station. I had managed to get past the people at the platform, quite pleased with myself for not contributing to my recycle bin at home when halfway thru the terminal I spotted the young people at the front. They were facing the street and handing out magazines to the people entering the station. I was relieved. Just then the young woman turned around and opening her mouth in a big yawn. She was turning away from the throng entering but of course, without realizing it turned to face the throng leaving. She blushed and looked down as I grinned.

The moral of the story - don't look back. Up, down, sideways are slightly more acceptable but never look back.

Passion Fruit

2008-04-19T16:39:00.004+10:00

Not to be out done by my friend Brad, I too have flowers in my garden. Yes, it is nearing winter in Australia and I have a passion fruit plant that is a bit out of season but the blooms are beautiful. The blooms are also very short lived. There is a story about the name of the passion fruit.

The story goes, “When Spanish explored South America they discovered that passion fruit was used in native folk medicine as a sedative. When the Spanish brought the passion fruit to Europe the leaves were used as a sleep-inducing medicine. The name 'Passion' was given by Catholic missionaries in South America. The corona threads of the passion flower were seen as a symbol of the crown of thorns, the five stamens for wounds, the five petals and five sepals as the ten apostles (excluding Judas and Peter) and the three stigmas for the nails on the cross.”

Called to be Light

2008-04-11T08:09:00.001+10:00

I had the distinct honour of attending Bishop Michael Nazir-Ali’s lecture on Islam and Christian relations. He is a great speaker and confirmed to me, anyway, that we should get to know our neighbours. He was helpful because he spoke of history of Islam and related stories of historic Christian/Islam encounters both good and bad. I was disappointed that most people that attended the public lecture were my age and older. Don’t young people care to be informed? (this is a tangent by the way)

The most important part of the Bishop’s visit was that he came to college and we had a small group session with him earlier in the day. His focus there was not so much the topic of his later lecture but he brought up the notion of “secularism” (his word). He defined secularism as the trend in Western society to make, change and interrupt laws without considering Christianity or God. He pointed out that the basis for all moral/ethical law in western society is based on the Bible. He works with lawmakers in the UK and is disturbed that most do not understand the ethic that the current laws comes from. He spends a great deal of his time educating lawmakers.

He seriously believed that morally we may be entering a “dark ages”. (I forgot who he cited for this idea). And as church leaders he charged us to be “Light” of the world. He compared the light image to the salt image. He believes that Christian for awhile have been salt and now must be light.

I asked what that looks like in the parish context. He said we must hold to Christian ethic and educate people on what the Bible says. He pointed out that even in a small church someone will need medical treatment that may come from research that buys aborted fetuses or from other far out means. He indicated that he has already had to take a stand against research into human animal cross breeding.

The dilemma. If the research helps hundreds or thousands, is it okay to in a laboratory make a half human/half cat to get the medicine from? Secularism says why not. I ask, “What does us teach us about the value of human life? And its relationship to God?” My answer, “Under these conditions, life becomes another throw away product.”

Called to be “Light”. Could this be why the book of Amos came up about a thousand times (seems like) during my discernment to candidate for ministry? Time will tell, I suppose.

Creation

2008-03-24T09:06:00.001+10:00

Creation has been a topic that seems to be in abundance recently. We watched Louie Giglio videos in church. Mal has purchased a couple books that explain science and the Bible. A blog I read had a couple of entries about creation. While I am trying to focus on the cross (and church reformed history), creation and its relationship to science keeps becoming the topic of discussion. So here ya go. Linda Hamill on creation….

First, for you to understand my position you need to understand some of the experiences that have influenced the development of these thoughts. I grew up in the country and there developed a respect for the land and the people. Our land was between two Native American reservations, so I also developed an appreciation for people’s stories.

The native people traditionally told stories to teach relationships; relationships between family, elders, other tribes, the land, and even animals. In the tribe, time, the measure of it, or the dependence on it was not the same as I was taught. I found time to be similarly not measured in the Pacific Islands.

I am not an anthropologist and just barely a theologian but I reckon Genesis chapter 1 is a story, in the sense of a tribal story explaining important relationships. When I studied Hebrew, I found that there were cultural aspects to the language that resonated well with me because I had grown up in the country and watched a tribe.

I use a bit of liberty in translating the Hebrew; actually, I tried to translate it quite literally and not attempting to put the translation into good English grammar. I also, used a bit of liberty in describing the telling of the story so imagine if you will, a group of people sitting around a campfire. The storyteller is in the middle casting shadows opposite the flame. The gaze of the faces around the fire is transfixed on the storyteller.

The storyteller puts up one hand and begins, “In the beginning,” the teller raises both hands to the sky and says, “God created the heavens and the earth,” thenlowering his arms to point to the ground.

“And the earth vacant and void,” the storyteller announces with a sense of urgency and awe so that the listeners wonder what will happen next. The storyteller does not pause but continues the suspense saying, “And darkness upon the faces of deep.”

Drawing a deep breath and noisily breathing out, whispers, “And God breathed and it fluttered over the waters.” The storyteller’s fingers flutter as if they were over the water.

The storyteller continues telling the actions of God in loud booming voice. “And God said “Be light” and light was. And God saw the light was good,” is pronounced with pride.

“And God divided between the light and between the darkness.” Then as if calling out to someone or something, the storyteller acts as if he were God calling, “And God called to the light, ‘day’; and to the darkness called, ‘night’.”

Then the dramatic actions cease and the storyteller stands tall and still and quietly proclaims, “And it was evening and it was morning, day first.” (Gen1:1-5)

The storyteller pauses before he continues telling the events of the next six days. I will not continue the story here but it seems to me that this is not a scientific explanation of the creation event.

This story is designed to give God the credit for creation. It introduces the Spirit of God, in the introduction of the ‘breath that fluttered over the waters.’ It introduces the Word, when God “called’ and ‘it was’ as if it were the Word itself that creates. Yes, I interpret this through the lens of the New Testament.

I understand this first chapter of Genesis as introducing important aspects of the God that is worshiped by the tribe that tells the story. The debate whether or not this is a scientific 24 hour day or a day as measured by God that to humanity could span year, is not relevant. If God is indeed God he could have created in seven 24 hour period or in seven set of God days that spanned years, the choice was/is God’s.

To try to pin down the science of creation is an interesting endeavor. I enjoy the reading and believe that God does reveal himself to people including myself through science but to get bogged down in that when telling the story misses much of the mystery and awe the people had for their God. So my comment on creation, “WOW!!.”

Passion Play

2008-03-17T15:28:00.005+10:00

On Saturday evening Mal and I went to Ashgrove Baptist Church to see their passion play, Jesus, Liar, Madman, God! and it was absolutely incredible. This play was presented at this church a couple years ago and we were unable to attend because of commitments to our own church but made the point of attending because my son-in-law John had a major part.

Written by one of their own, this drama was the story of Jesus condensed to 1.5 hours, was told in modern Australian language and characters were in modern clothes. I was totally caught up in the play. I think for me the best part (other than John's characters) was the Jesus character. He was a bit wild, free, and alot loving and caring, just how I believe Jesus to be. This Jesus was very much like the Jesus who Scot McKnight described in chapter 4 of his book The Story of the Christ.

Many of the actors had 2 or maybe even 3 parts. I was impressed how they changed clothes and character so easily. John was Caiaphas and Thomas and he switched between the two parts flawlessly. And so did all the actors. The band was just a professional as the acting. The lights and sound matched. Well done Ashgrove Baptist, way to bring glory to God by telling the story of the Son.

Tired

2008-03-12T19:33:00.003+10:00

Well we are about 4 weeks into formation for this semester. Tomorrow, I will turn in my first assignment in the Church Reform 16& 17 century subject. What on? you ask. Just a bit about Luther comments on his Preface to Paul's Letter to the Romans. It is interesting. As for formation, well, I think I am just too tired. It seems to be a common song among the students in my formation group. "I am tired."

We are the group of students who are in field placement; that is we work in church for 30 hours per week plus one subject, which amounts to 7-10 per week and spend a day, 8 hours, in formation. This actually equals 48 hours which should not be too big a week. But I suspect most of us work more than 30 hours in our placements.

I also believe that some of the tiredness in formation is the fact that formation is on Monday. After a couple of worship services on Sundays, most ministers I know are tired. It is not always a physical tired, but often emotional and spiritual tiredness. Many ministers I know have Monday off. Others try to keep Monday a light work day. So if ministers know this, why does the field group have to reflect spiritually and emotionally on a Monday. Wouldn't it make more sense to do this some other day of the week? Just asking.

why I boycott..

2008-02-14T08:07:00.002+10:00

M&Ms.

About 3 years ago, I began to boycott M&Ms because the candies were playing strip poker in a television ad. It was cute but it was also just at the end of prime time on a weekend and I really didn't believe that kids would be asleep and I really didn't think playing strip poker or people in their underwear was an appropriate why to sell candy. There was no link to this ad on their website as the website is pretty much designed for kids. But when I emailed, my concern, instead of the patronizing thank you for your response, we will consider it; they responded, "this is our society". I disagree and emailed that I would no longer purchase their product, thank you.

Today, they are still using nudity to sell candy and I still will not purchase them.

Thank you

For Discussion

2008-02-12T08:10:00.000+10:00

Cold is the absence of heat; so is evil the absence of good? What would absolute zero good look like? Evil maybe? Or is there some force that is unequivocally evil?

This question began when a theology student called the snake in the garden (Gen 3) evil. (I recently heard a minister call the snake; satan) But,no where does it say the serpent is evil; crafty and later on cursed.

As I discussed this with people around me, it soon became evident that there were several connotations of evil. So we began to try to pin that down. I am interested in your input.

Enough said

2008-01-24T16:35:00.000+10:00

HEY, DON'T PEEK, I'M ON THE POT!

Yes, an original photo from my yard yesterday.

Small

2008-01-15T15:50:00.000+10:00

I am small. This is not some sort of self-bashing. This is a fact of creation. God is very big. The universe somewhat smaller and that is pretty big so comparatively I am small. I am however, larger than my friend Bunsen’s 3dz2 orbital density plot (a plot of electrons).
I like being small compared to God though. I thank God that I do not have to worry about planets and their rotations or how life lays dormant in a seed. Being small means I don’t have to go it alone. I can hang around with other small people and let God be God.

Being small allows me, for example, in a theological debate to see that at the beginning of the debate is another small person who desperately wants to bring glory to our great big God. The debate itself indicates there are many small people who want to get it right (knowing what is right to God is possibly not within our reach but we debate in order to get as close to right as we can). And while the debate and my study goes on so that I too might get closer to right, I figure that if God calls into use this small cracked pot to deliver his message then it is probably close enough to right for his purposes at that time.

Graduated!!

2008-01-14T15:13:00.001+10:00

No I have not graduated from college yet. My glasses have graduated before I have. While I am tremendously happy to be able to see when I sit at the computer or read and with a nod of my head be able to see out the window into the distance at the same time, the adjustment has not been without struggle. I am embarrassed to say I was car sick the first day and not even in a car. As the weekend progressed, I got the knack of the nod and even was able to lead worship without too much difficulty. The problem now is restricting the nod to vision purposes and not nod too often when in agreement otherwise I simply agree with you but may not be able to see you or your point.

Visual

2008-01-02T15:45:00.000+10:00

Happy New Year. Wow, I have lost track of time. I meant to blog long before now. I resolve to do better this year.

A few weeks ago, we played a Playstation 2, Eye toy game. Mirrors is a simple game that requires you to touch the spots in the corners of the television screen. The eye toy is a camera that puts your image on the screen so you see yourself touching the spots. But then the screen turns like a mirror from left to right. Your image on the screen is now like a mirror and in order to touch the spots on the left you raise your right hand. Then the image turns upside down. Now you move your hand down to touch the spots on the top of the screen. Of course the spots are really at the bottom of the image that you see (you see yourself upside down with spots by your legs) so moving down is logical. However, the spots are at the top of the screen so moving up seems to also be logical. The screen also turns you upside down and mirrored left to right.

I knew before this game that I am a visual learner. So I found this game more difficult than my husband who is a logical person. I had to consciously override the signal that my eyes sent to the brain that said the spots are at the top of the screen as opposed to the bottom of the image.

At times to override what I saw, I had to move my body to the left or right and fool my brain into thinking I was responding so that the correct motion could be made. Otherwise, at times I simply could not move my hands because of the conflicting signals.

I was reminded of how difficult Faith can be. Hebrews 11:1 (NRSV) Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. Maybe the difficulty is not in the unseen but in the things we see that are in conflict with the unseen?

Still in use

2007-11-03T10:48:00.000+10:00

So for all you that just had to know.....this is what a cracked pot looks like and how it works.

Why I can't take myself too seriously 1

2007-10-23T10:43:00.000+10:00

Today, I received a lovely email from a friend (female). The email had a poem with pictures and at the bottom said, I just didn't want to miss the opportunity to tell you I love you. So I happily replied to the email, "I love you too" and a short update about my travel plans. Then I clicked send and to my horror (humor really) realized that I was sending my reply to the original sender of this forwarded poem (male). For some reason many of the emails I receive from this friend are forwarded as attachments which when I open seem to open the original email that she got. I am usually clever enough to close this email and reply directly to her. Not today.

So in heaps of giggles, I email her and explain and asked her to let the original sender know. She replied, "Oh, you make me laugh..." Which made me giggle more. Of course, in giggles had to call my husband at work and let him know how funny I thought this was.

Then received an email from the originator saying, "I am curious, I can't think of who you are...."

Which made me laugh more. I am such a goof. At any rate, there is not much chance that I will suffer from taking myself too seriously any time soon.

PS: It is not so bad as it sounds. I know the guy.

Moving sheep

2007-10-12T07:42:00.001+10:00

I have heard people exclaim that getting their particular group to do something together is like herding cats. I think most people have witnessed the independence of cats and can relate to the potential difficulties. I have, however, experience with moving sheep and relate well to the Biblical phrase “the LORD is my shepherd” (Psalm 23:1).

I thought it appropriate to capture some of the memories of moving sheep.

I remember a few beautiful days, lovely weather and sheep that moved almost effortlessly from one pasture to the fresh pasture. But mostly, I remember, having to do a lot of running and some fancy footwork that would put the best dancer to shame. Of course, the object was to never have to run because that tended to scare the sheep. Moving sheep, always began as gently walking around on one side causing the sheep to graze in a particular direction. I remember this as the easy part. Then we got to the gate. Things got a little hairy at this point. The sheep would circle around but not go through the gate. At this point, Dad would take a bucket of grain and try to coax a “Lead”sheep through. This was often pointless, the “lead” sheep would go through with a few others and when the flock did not follow, they would return back through the gate. Occasionally, we used dogs to coax the sheep through the gate but Dad and probably Grampa before him thought that the end result of using the dogs was wild sheep. So the use of dogs seemed to be kept to a minimum. I can remember a few times, that we sort of carried sheep through the gate one at a time until there was a critical mass on the other side of the gate the encouraged the rest through. I remember a few times, all of a sudden the whole flock went through the gate for no apparent reason after having been at a stand still for some time.

This was not always in the lovely weather. Many times it was cold. Occasionally, we used horse and riders. But most of it was on foot and why not we were kids. A couple of times, an old ewe would bolt back and hit you dead on. It not only knocked a kid over it knocked the wind out of you. It took minutes to be able to breathe again and you had to get right back up. It was better to be knocked over than run over so you didn’t want to be lying on the ground.

Moving ewes that had lambs created additional challenges. Why would a mother, of any sort, leave her lamb to go and look for the very lamb she left? Strange but true.

Green pastures never seemed to be a good enough motivation for sheep to go through the gate.

What I learned from herding sheep…
Be patient
Be patient
If you cannot be patient get help from someone who can be
Be creative
Don’t give up; it is in the best interest of the sheep to be in green pasture and after all you are there for the benefit of the flock as that is in the shepherd’s best interest as well (Circular argument).
And lastly be patient

PS: I asked my Dad for some of his sheep memories. He said herding sheep was staying with them 24/7. He has done this, I have not. I have only experienced “working” sheep and “moving” sheep. “Moving” being a short stint at herding about a day long. Dad commented that it was while herding that you really get to know the sheep and yourself.

The Garden

2007-09-29T09:35:00.001+10:00

I have been meaning to post these thoughts for a while but wanted a photo of my back yard to post with it and up till today did not have such a photo. I love this view of the garden. There are tall trees and not so tall trees; if you look closely you will see dead trees. There are plants dying and there is new life shooting from the decay. There is bamboo that is not native next to the native gum. There are all colors, shapes and sizes. There are a few weeds but remember a weed is just a plant out of place. There are a few plants stifled and crowded. There are plants with plenty of room. Some plants don’t get much sunshine and wish they did and there are plants in the shade that love it there. There are trees that are very old and there are the very young. There is a small creek. There are birds and snakes, frogs and lizards, probably stray cats as well. There is diversity. There is a small group of dedicated, loving people that remove the plants that would kill the garden. In the daylight, the garden is a beautiful, safe place for people to stroll and enjoy but in the dark, the garden can attract people who have less than honorable intentions. It is the garden that I enjoy being in and looking upon. It is all there in the garden; the place that God designed.

Briar Creek Retreat

2007-09-11T10:04:00.001+10:00

Briar Creek Retreat is a thing, event, place that does not exist; at least not yet. It is a dream (which I believe God inspired) for a retreat centre for ministers. A couple we know have tried to send their minister and family on retreat only to find the cost of the retreat centers prohibiting. They also found that these places had many activities that were part of the cost. They began to see the need for a place for ministers and families to go with little or no cost and simply have time to be, to relate with each other and to have control of activities or lack of activity. At this imaginary place, there will be cabins with names; a community breakfast, if you want; a lake; walks; a garden and nearby a town with concerts; boating, fishing, etc. Will it be real? I think so. I see the need for such a place and am supportive of the dream. Right now, it is at the trust God for the funding stage. I believe in about 4 -5 years this place will be real and Mal and I will be sitting by the lake with my Dad, maybe with siblings, children and grandchildren. Care to join me?

"I killed a bird with two stones"*

2007-09-04T16:12:00.000+10:00

Sometimes we all miss our mark. Two birds with one stone is a special event and perhaps even one bird with one stone. But I think many times to get to what we are aiming at we need to “throw” several “stones”. I believe that it is okay to keep trying to achieve good goals. The idea would be to make sure the bird that we are aiming at is truly the one we want. After that, fire away. Otherwise, you simply join the ranks of people who throw stones.

*Mia, 2 September 2007

Stormy Weather

2007-08-22T09:27:00.001+10:00

When it rains, it pours. I take that back – not always. Often in my life there have been gentle rains. Rains that I are not so messy, rains that I have walked through with my children, where there have been puddles to jump into for fun. But other times, it doesn’t just rain; it pours. I have to say, that God has blessed me with what I am doing. It hasn’t been a cruise but busy enough and challenging enough to fill my time. I have seen things that should be done but have left them because they are not urgent and they are not my job. Had I picked up every job that I saw needing to be done, it would have been too much. I believe that God has blessed me with a real picture of ministry over the last three months. Then it pours. I realize that this is a season; only one week really. While the weather is chilly and blustery outside in Brisbane indeed, in my life, the weather is now calm until next week probably when I start work again.

Once in a lifetime

2007-07-30T13:11:00.000+10:00

We often justify our expenses, our actions, our decisions by saying that they are "once in a lifetime". I think that phrase really is justification. The truth is that every moment of our lives is only once in a lifetime but we seldom treat them as such. I believe that we need to stop chasing expensive "once in a lifetime" opportunities, stop justifying things as "once in a lifetime" and start paying attention to the moments. I'll stop preaching now!

When you don’t know what to blog

2007-07-04T13:49:00.001+10:00

Well since this is a weekly journal and it has been a week, I need to blog something. I don’t know if it is because I am tired or because there is a holiday this week or because I have too much to say or not enough but I don’t know what to say so may just log a few random thoughts like:

Why do people never say what they mean or think? Me included. For example, instead of telling my daughter I am proud of her college/uni grades. I say great you’re catching up with me. I should probably just have said I am proud. (Hi Mia, I am proud of you!) That is just one of many examples that I have come across this week.

Why do you just get to the cruise stage of something then it changes? Yeah, yeah, “Rejoice in our sufferings knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope and hope does not put us to shame…” (Rom 5:3-5a ESV) But do we need to remain in that cycle so much of the time?

Why does time go so fast? I am halfway through my Guam time and I don’t want to be halfway a quarter way would be fine. I am just catching on, see the paragraph above. Of course the reverse applies, if it were not fulfilling and educational, time would probably be dragging. Age old modern question, huh?

Well this will have to be enough rambling. I feel like I am just being silly and killing time.

From humiliation to humility

2007-06-26T16:54:00.000+10:00

Just over 5 years ago on Guam, I had to get some paperwork from the public health office. I remember this experience as humiliating. First of all, this is not a nice building, run down, and abused. I was ignorant of the reason that a healthy person with insurance would have to go to “public health”. I was very prideful because at the time, I was living well below the U.S. poverty level and had insurance and enough money, so it seemed an insult to me that I had to go hang out at public health with “real” poor people. I was concerned that I would be judged as in the same category as everyone else there. You know the stigma thing. Maybe, it wasn’t only pride, a bit of fear because my family and I were so close to being there in need.

As God would have it, I had to go back again for the same piece of paper. The original had been lost from my record. I hoped that public health would have the record and could copy it but no, I had to go through all interviews and steps in the process all over. However, this time I was not humiliated. I was humble. I sat with people in real need. The number of children out numbered adults. They were all patiently waiting there turn, no one complained. Most people even seemed grateful to have a place to turn to in their need. There was no stigma. I was there for what I was there for and everyone else was there for whatever they were there for. I was too caught up in myself to notice anyone else the first time.

I thank God for the opportunity to see how much I have grown by this sort of apple for apple comparison.

When the roll is called...

2007-06-20T07:08:00.001+10:00

I don’t think about death too often; in fact, I can probably count the number times on one hand, but recently pondered death for a bit. I think it is a healthy thing to do as long as death is not the continuing thought. One should remember one’s mortality in order to appreciate life and live.

I thought of death when I enlisted into the Air Force Reserve. I was to enlist just before 9-11 but was held up by some paperwork, then after 9-11 had to think, we are at war, am I ready to do this and possibly die? I enlisted.

I thought of death when I was told that my tuberculosis skin test was positive. I know that people do not die from TB much anymore but I was just beginning life with Mal and didn’t want to think about death when life only seemed to be beginning.

I think of Mal dying once in a while. He is older than I am and the chance is he will die before me. I read in a marriage book that you should mourn the death of your partner together while you are both alive. That way you do not miss the opportunity to say, “I will miss you.”

But I thought of me dying this week. I was sitting in the clinic in a great deal of pain from an outer ear infection. I first was thinking of the purpose of pain; to signal to the brain that something is wrong. But as I thought, I decided that pain for many of us may need to be part of death. As I sat there in pain, I thought if God tapped me on the shoulder at that moment and said your time on earth is up, I would have readily gone. The pain would stop. I desired that. I know that God is not tapping but at the same time recognized I was ready and not afraid.

I am not sure that once the pain stops I will be able to say the same thing. Once life is pain free, I am not sure I will feel the same way about dying; I will not be ready to die, I will desire to live. So maybe I will need a bit of pain to encourage me to my eternal home. Maybe…

Fight or Flight

2007-06-15T16:58:00.001+10:00

Today, I met with my supervisor at his office at the Bible College. I am in the Air Force Reserve and came straight from the base to his office so was still in uniform. It also meant that I was coming to the college from the opposite direction and when I got to about where I thought it was and didn’t see it, I stopped at a shop and asked a young man if he knew where the college was. He point just there. I was close so headed back to my car then he called to me. I stopped and he asked me, “Why do you want to go study Bible and go fight for our freedom?” I stopped dead in my tracks. I was late for my appointment so I gave him the easy answer, “I am just going there for a meeting.” But then I did not have long enough drive to campus to really give this deep thought so here it is on the blog. The truth is I don’t want to fight for freedom. I don’t want to fight period. This was probably not true when I enlisted, oh so many years ago. I have put too much time in to just give up the retirement benefits. And most of the time I enjoy my military work because I can do ministry and serve people where I am. I was told by my commanding officer that I have a certain ethic about me. Could it be….God? I believe so and the comment tells me that God is working there. Tough question, why study the Bible and fight for freedom? I feel called where I am so could say, “God told me to.” Or I could just say, “I have a meeting.

My Home?

2007-06-08T08:07:00.001+10:00

“This world is not my home; I’m just a passing through...” All houses are temporary.

I have invited people to our house for dinner. Then I had to say, the Pastor’s house, but had to change that again because the house belongs to the church. I invited my friends to my temporary house to which the response came all houses are temporary.

I fully understand that I am in this lovely location in Guam for another 8 or so weeks but we have a townhouse in Brisbane, how long will I be there? A couple of years probably, Mal and I purchased it with the intention of staying forever. Even then, I knew that was not really true and just a figure of speech. Even when we bought the house I knew it was just for a time until God called.

Ever since we purchased, we thanked God for the home and prayed that God would use it for his purposes. But often I forget that it is God’s house. I wanted new floors, I was planning new floors for me. I hate the existing floors and was demanding new ones. God said, “It’s not your house.” Then, tiles began to fall off of the bathroom wall. I was devastated. Now, we have beautiful new bathrooms and fresh paint in the bedrooms and the same floors. Not my plan, I was happy with the bathrooms. But the result, I need to not plan so much and just let it be God’s house. God can plan and the results are beyond my dreams and better than what I would have done.

If God can do that with a house, what would happen if we gave him all our possessions? What would happen if we gave him our lives?

“My treasures are laid out somewhere beyond the blue. The angels beckon me from heaven’s open door and I can’t feel at home in this world anymore.”

A Cracked Pot

2007-05-31T10:31:00.000+10:00

I was asked the other day why my blog is named “A cracked pot”. It was suggested that I put the explanation onto the blog. While at the time I thought it not necessary, I now feel moved to explain.

Probably about 15 years ago a very dear friend of mine was struggling. She complained that she wanted to be a vessel for God and that with so much happening in her life she didn’t feel like a usable vessel. Suddenly at that moment in the discussion, I believe God gave me a word for her, but it happened suddenly; I had the picture of a plate come into my mind. It was earthen, shallow vessel; a plate is the best way to describe it. As I explained what I saw, she began to be a bit excited. She was indeed a vessel for God and the description fit perfectly for where she was at the time. She asked how I saw myself and at that time I saw an earthen vase big and round on the bottom so that it would not tip easily. And it had a long narrow neck with a bit of a flare at top. Then we had some laughs as I told her about the crack that I felt ran down the side; a cracked pot.

The discussion has been memorable for both of us and usually when my friend and I converse the memory of that conversation and laughter about the “cracked pot” begins again. I believe the laughter is because we know that it is true. We cannot serve God whole and that his Spirit and strength flows like water through our wounds and cracks.

I feel moved to write this because again I recognized that I am cracked, not whole. I have always known this but this morning I felt it. I did not recognize the pressure that I was putting on myself till it popped. You see, I woke this morning with only two things on my mind; finishing my essay and writing a sermon. Pretty much, everything else was blocked out. I desperately wanted the assignment finished because that is the last bit that is hanging left from my past and I want it finished so that I can press on into the now. The now being a sermon for Sunday that has been rolling around in my head crying to get out.

Because I became so focused, I missed a finance meeting. I took time out to call my Dad because family is a priority then totally forgot the meeting and jumped into finishing the essay.

I know that my presence at the meeting was not imperative. I may miss another, the next one, because of the kindy’s Vacation Bible School. But I want people to know I support them and I wanted the opportunity to get to know people and their roles. But I blew it. Yup, I feel stupid. I know that it is not because there were expectations of people that I may have really let them down. It is because, my mistake was not taking the time to review the calendar, I let outside pressure control instead of relaxing and letting God worry about it all and doing what needed to be done.

I will probably make this mistake again in different ways and situations but I think I have learned to set aside time in the morning to look to God, listen and layout a schedule that will ease the pressure and meet all the requirements.

Well, I better finish so that I can check my calendar and finish my day better than I started. I think it is important how a person recovers and regroups after an attack of stupidity (a topic for another entry).

Oh yeah, I have the design for a cracked pot water feature for my yard if we ever come off water restrictions. I have already a great collection of you guessed it – cracked pots.

PS: I can't help but feel better the kids at the kindy are playing water games outside, it looks like great fun.

In Place

2007-05-24T17:50:00.001+10:00

I am not in place yet. I have come to Guam moved into the manse (parsonage) and not started much ministry. I think that although it has been difficult not to just jump right in and get going that it is better this way. God has allowed my to exercise patience. Patience is a muscle that like all muscles requires exercise in order to be strong. The fact that I am here and not involved allows me time to see and listen and discern. I think that this is the first skill that field placement has taught me. Take your time and get to know what is going on, then jump in. I am looking forward to next week after I have taken the plunge.

Guarantee

2007-05-14T20:00:00.001+10:00

As I see it, I have one guarantee; life eternal with my Lord. I write as a reflection on my daughter’s wedding to a wonderful man name John. During the day, I so enjoyed watching them smile. They are truly happy and seem to me to be well suited for each other. John’s best man commented that he has never seen the “well-balanced” (John’s Dad’s words) John so happy.

I wish that somehow I could promise them life long together. I do not wish them an easy life because I believe much character and strength and wisdom and hope (Rom ) is built through trials. But I do pray for them that it is a life-long marriage. But….I can’t guarantee that. Now that I think about it, I cannot even guarantee them long-life.

During the vows, I prayed that they would not suffer broken vows and divorce like I did. But I can’t guarantee.

I am aware that there were people at the wedding struggling from the recent results of broken marriage. I wish I could have guaranteed them a life-long marriage as I prayed for them at their wedding.

Not long after the beautiful wedding yesterday, I was notified of family members whose behavior was not in the least bit marriage strengthening for them. In fact, the behavior puts the marriage at risk. I can’t guarantee not even for my family.

The fault of course is sin. Sin, I define as separation from God. My marriage broke down when my ex-husband made choices that separated him from God. As a result, I guess I became closer to God; my response to trials that build endurance, character, and hope.

I cannot really comment on any other marriage break up but I reckon someone walked away from or never had God in most cases. I see marriage at risk when people step away from God.

It is so easy to do. Young couples, like I was and did, get married, get busy, have kids, life is good and going to worship becomes difficult. As the church attendance waned so did my connection with God. I turned back to God after time but my husband came and went and finally went permanently.

The guarantee was and ever will be God. My prayer for you Deb and John, and all people, is that you stick close to a church and to the people who will help you and pray for you and challenge you to connect and reconnect with God, your guarantee.

Amen.

Community

2007-05-06T15:43:00.000+10:00

Well, this will be a busy week so thought that I would put some thoughts into a blog while I have time.

Today in worship, we prayed for Deb and John's wedding coming up on Saturday. And our minister read from the notices that the congregation was invited to attend and take part in the service that day. It struck me that this is how weddings are intended to be. They should be an experience of worshiping God. Not just the couple who are to wed but the entire congregation. I felt that people who have weddings outside their congregation or do not have a congregation are somehow missing out on the experience of God in their marriage. They are leaving out some very important people of the wedding party - the congregation who will support them and pray for them and stick with them through the entire marriage; call them the church family.

Romans 15:5
May the God of steadfastness and encouragement grant you to live in harmony with one another, in accordance with Christ Jesus, so that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ (NRSV)
Amen.

Debrief

2007-04-30T18:14:00.000+10:00

Debrief is an interesting word that seems to be in fashion. Let's take a look at how that seems to work in ministry. There is an incident, say with a minor injury. The minister debriefs people so that the carry no unhealthy guilt or shame about the incident. The incident report is done. Then the minister does not get to debrief for 4 - 6 weeks when they meet with their professional supervisor. I realize that the minister probably does have a network of minister friends to call on and pour out to. But it seems the minister sort of gets the raw deal.

Is this because in the past, there was perception that ministers were sort of better than everyone else. Once ordained does a person became some sort of super human that can handle anything?

I agree ministers have a great deal of training and gifting to debrief but they are still human. I am happy that ministers have professional supervisors to debrief with at all. This is a positive change.

So the underlying issue really is, how do the ordained keep the being set apart and the being human in a balance tension? My answer, they need to be true to themselves. Once you try to be something else, whosh the balance is tipped.

No end in sight - Half of Chapter 2

2007-04-25T09:33:00.000+10:00

I did get this far on Chapter 2 before getting bogged. So till there is time this will have to do.

As I told you, I am non-player in a storyline that began more than 2,000 years ago. Now you may wonder how why people with the same hope in a Kingdom of the same God would come to part ways. What was it specifically that this man/God did that could divide so many for so long? Well, let me see if I can explain.

Long before the man/God entered the story, the people of the original storyline were expecting a Savior from God to redeem them and usher in the Kingdom. The prophets of old told of this event. In beautiful poetic imagery, the expectation, prophesy really, of the Savior developed. As the expectation developed so did strong opinions on what would happen when the Savior would come. Many expected sounds of trumpet and an entrance fit for a King after all, the Savior was to reign in the promised Kingdom.

But God came as a man. Not really an ordinary man but a man born of a virgin. Remarkable, unbelievable really unless you believe that it was God. God would not need a man to be born. God had already created man. But to be born human, God would need to be born from a woman.

Setting aside the birth, the man/God did remarkable things. He challenged people to love, to understand the commandments through the lens of love. He challenged people to do the right thing and find fulfillment in honesty and integrity. He challenged people to have relationship with and worship God not to simply follow religious rules. He caused miracles to happen. He healed many. He broke down barriers and accepted all people.

Wow, that sounds like a Kingdom already, not a kingdom that we know about but a kingdom worth waiting for and believing in. Many believed and many followed. But some were threatened. The man/God had turned the tables on power and authority. He broke down barriers that some believe sacred; the Savior would not save all only the chosen. And a nail was driven in the fabric of the story. Slowly, ever so slowly, the fabric of the story began to tear in two.

Some people began to seek ways to kill the man. They did not believe that he was God. These people could only see their immediate situation and the loss of their power and control of the masses. Some were afraid. Some may have been trying to push that man into taking authority like the king they believed he was. In the end, the motivations were complex and maybe even not recorded however, history has proven over and over since that time, and before, that people will kill for power.
In a mighty climax, the opposition made their move and killed the man/God. Not just a quick killing but the man/God suffered, was beaten, mocked and nailed to a cross; the most humiliating death that can be imagined. The end? Oh no, not quite.

Many believed it to be the end; the leader dead, the followers scattered. The people responsible maybe breathed a sigh of relief. The followers were stunned and amazed; lost and grieving. What had happened? Was there no hope that the Kingdom would come? But it was not the end.

The leader rose again. Alive. The man/God walked again with the people. He was seen by many. So convincingly, that the group again banded together to proclaim the coming of the promised and now soon expected Kingdom. These people knew now with the utmost certainty that they had seen the Savior of God. Only God could die and come back to life and they believed he would come again to claim his people.

But wait, God die? How can God do that? I don’t know. God is God. But follow along with me this does make sense. In the beginning of the story, for people to be in right relationship with God, they needed to love God above all and love all around them like God does. This is not an easy task, in fact is impossible to do all the time, so God put into place a system of sacrifices, cleansing and worship that would allow for the atonement of sins. This however, meant continual sacrifices as any single person would get it wrong eventually again after a sacrifice. The belief then was that the Savior would save once and for all.

Overload

2007-04-25T09:26:00.000+10:00

Okay, I am officially overloaded. I would like to blog my ideas on the difference between God's will and man's will. But have not had time.
I would like to discuss symbols. What they mean to who.
I would like to discuss time management. This goes in cycles you know. You keep up then suddenly, there is a wrench (spanner for you Australians) in the cogs and boy is it tough going getting back on track.
There are 3 major essays I would like to do before I leave for Guam.
There is my daughter's wedding.
There are my church jobs.
I am a wife.
Mother.
Housekeeper.
Although, reflection on all these areas happens, I have little time to record it because it there is little time
Please don't feel sorry for me. I do not think I am different than anyother. Just pray.
Thanks

Missed a week

2007-04-18T16:56:00.000+10:00

Yes, I missed a week of blogging. I went on holiday and joined my husband in Melbourne. It was a lovely time. I communed with lovely ladies at a beautiful stone church in Williamstown. We feasted, broke bread with friends and family. I did some reading and a bit of writing.
Oh yeah, I shopped too.

Complacency

2007-04-03T11:38:00.000+10:00

Complacency

I was visiting with my Dad not too long ago, when I commented on people that are “way smarter than I am”. He stated that it may not be a bad thing to keep notice of that. By noticing I would never become complacent. We went on to discuss how complacency fills work places with unhappy workers and fills churches with people wondering why they don’t get anything out of worship anymore. They have become complacent so do not put anything into it and in return get little out of it.

My Dad is a wise man for the most part and I am proud to have him for my Dad. I will work hard at whatever I do, meaning I will try not to be complacent, so that I can honour him. I will keep this in balance, though, with the notion that he is already proud of me, so I have nothing to prove.

God is wiser than my Dad. With God, I have even less to prove but still need to work at not being complacent. Right now, while I am studying, that is relatively easy to do. I am confronted daily with ideas that are bigger than I am and feel often that I am on the edge of this great revelation but never quite getting it.

My challenge, when in full time ministry, will be in spite of the routine to be excited, as I am now, to continue to learn and seek knowledge as if I am always on the edge of that big discovery.

Calculated Risk

2007-03-30T16:52:00.000+10:00

Just about everything a minister does has risk. The simplest greeting, “How are you doing?” can be responded to in anger or fits of tears. This does not mean that we should not take the risk; it means that we need to manage the consequences.
Here is how I do that.
First, I recognize that I have baggage. I have baggage from previous relationships of all sorts that have left me hurt and believing a pack of lies. These packs of lies create my baggage.
Random tangent, I think that over the years, I have become reasonably good at shedding baggage, both literally and figuratively. In my life I have made major moves that have required me to shed almost all of my personal belongings. Twice in my life I have started completely over in a totally new environment with only 12 suitcases/boxes between me and my girls. I have learned not to be attached to material things. My lounge suite is nice but if God says; it is adios lounge (I hope not again but we will see).
Likewise, the figurative baggage, I have learned to shed by holding on to truth. You see if you hold onto truth, you don’t have hands available to hold onto the baggage. That’s how I see it anyway.
Back on track, to manage consequences, the second thing is to realize that others have baggage. They may not define their baggage like I define mine so will not comment on others baggage but I know that their baggage is likely to contain some untruths or unhealed hurts, or unforgiveness of others or self.
After both of these issues are recognized and are in the open; it is much easier to respond to the unexpected in a calm and loving way. Many times, the loving response is all that is needed to right the situation. Sometimes, I will have to help people offload baggage. How? You might ask. Get them to hold onto truth. But I will save that for a future blog.
PS: I am working risk assessments that include God in the consequences. Keep ya posted.