Down under

It is Christmas.  My rose bushes are blooming.  Yes, roses for Christmas.   It seems somewhat odd to me.  I grew up in the northern hemisphere, where Christmas is nestled neatly into the cold and snow.  Perhaps, it is not so in America's south but where I grew up Christmas is cold.  This year, I have trimmed my tree and cut roses for the dining table.  After Christmas, we will go to the cricket.  I really mean, "the" cricket, as we will go to the MCG (Melbourne Cricket Ground) for the Boxing Day (the day after Christmas) test match.  There is a bat and ball so my American friends might think of it as a sport like baseball (although not at all like baseball) in December.  But remember, it is not cold it is summer here, the roses are blooming and the game is on.

Prayers for you and your family though this blessed time when we remember God's gift to the world and anticipate Christ's coming into the world.

Merry Christmas to all!

Don't ask why

I love the outdoors.  Last week, Mal and I were in North Queensland, Etty beach near Innisfail to be exact.  There I watch a Cassowary and baby, they are fascinating.  There was a man above the retaining wall trying to scare them away.  He was a safe distance as the parent was over a meter (bit more than a yard) tall.  He said that they are not too smart.  They actually look a bit dinosaur to me with the horn and all.  Don't ask why they have a horn.

Then at the beach in the wet sand were many beads of sand push out of holes by mini crabs.

  The beads made beautiful patterns on the beach.  They seemed to be star-shaped patterns but were probably quite random.  Don't ask why they made pretty patterns.  

These are things I don't know, I just observe.  I have to admit, I have lots of observations and don't really know anything about them.  Sometimes, I wager a guess.  Sometimes, maybe divine inspiration gives me knowledge.  A lot, I just don't know.  God knows and most of the time that is good enough for me.  

Weddings are a big deal

The wedding was Saturday and I am still a bit tired.  Yesterday, I literally just showed up at things there was not much thinking or anything; but I was there.  The wedding was a lot of fun and went very well.  It was all beautiful.  So why am I so tired?  Mia and Sam did almost everything (Mal and I and Sam's parents did fork out dough) but the work was done by a determined young couple.  I think Deb support Mia a lot as only sisters can do.  And Sam's mom recycled a dress for Mia.  But I am tired.  I didn't sleep much on Friday night, that is because my girls didn't sleep.  So I am sure that contributes.  I imagine my tired is because I put all my emotion and spirit into wanting their wedding to be perfect and not getting in their way.  I am so glad for them that this is behind them and they can press forward into the world and life ahead of them.   Mia n Sam - if your watching,  I love you both and pray that you have a wonderful trip. I can't wait till you get back to hear all about it.  Take lots of photos!

Keep Watch

There is a wedding dress hanging from my balcony in the middle of my living room.  The dress has been carefully ironed and hangs high so that it will not get crushed in a closet.  It is covered with a sheet to keep it clean.  I feel pretty sure that all the details for my daughter's wedding on Saturday have been addressed.  I am just keeping watch, trimmed the lamps, have plenty of oil, but I know the hour of the wedding.

Today, I will put up our Christmas tree (meant to have the done already :) in preparation for Christmas.  I have some gifts to put under the tree so am just about ready for Christmas day.  But there is more than celebrating that Christ came.  I expect the Lord's return though I don't know the hour.  Sometimes I forget that he is coming and have my life busy and so full already that there would scarcely be time for that appointed day.  I plan to take some time, this Christmas to be ready too for the advent (coming) of the Lord.   I am not sure really how to do that but I imagine it like getting ready for my girl's wedding.  I sat and listened to what they wanted then worked my heart out to make that happen for them because I love them so.  I will take some time to listen to what God wants then with all my heart make it happen.  I will let you know how that goes.....

Twisted

We have a pine tree in our yard.  In a few months, the tree will provide pine nuts for the local parrots.

This tree is normally a near perfectly round, ornamental tree.  But the storm has changed the tree's orientation.

Over a year ago, I had the opportunity to take a trauma ministry workshop run by the US military chaplains.  The context they used was, of course, military; however, the information presented was easily extracted and put into any trauma situation.  

One point made was that trauma can twist an individual's view of God.  We were then given some tools to help correct that.  Step one - make sure my orientation didn't get twisted.

Update

Well, huge orange tarps cover our roof and overall they are doing a wonderful job.  Mother Nature, however, is severely challenging Mals ability to be a good steward of the nice home God has blesses us with.  Every day is hot and humid and every afternoon more thunderstorms, wind, rain and in some places hail, so every morning Mal gets up and resets the tarps from where the wind has moved them to where the need to be.  Every evening storm leaves Mal pacing exclaiming that he can't believe the wind has moved the tarps again.  I am also amazed because the tarps are not only roped down but are actually bolted to the brick walls of the house.  But for the most part the tarps are doing what they should be doing.  UPDATE:  The SES have just come to check tarps after last night's wind and offered Mal a job with North Queensland  crew.  He will be chuffed.

In addition to all our goings and comings, our house has been a staging area for food and water distribution.  There has been, I don't know how many people or how much food go through our house into the community for families and workers.  

My washing machine only gets about 8 hours rest a day, the same as the rest of us.  

On Wed the storm that came through made Mal's daughter Sally a victim as well.  Her unit sits above the garage and is near a creek.  The storm washed all the debris down the creek to a bridge where it flooded and filled Sally's garages with nearly a meter of water and mud.  She lost much of the stuff she had stored in the garage.  Every storm brings more damage to more communities all around.  Flooding is happening all over the country.

The neighbourhoods are for the most part travel-able so on the outside things appear quite normal but I know that inside homes people are still reeling.  There is subtle damage.  Our neighbour and friend died suddenly on Wed.  He was elderly so you can't really say that it was storm damage but it leaves you wondering.  

Thank you everyone for your prayers and support.  We (our whole community) will soon be back on its feet because of your response.  

Red Cross

I was not ready for the Red Cross to knock on my door.  Mal and I are doers.  I can't think that I have ever received much of anything but prayers and comfort, maybe a meal at anytime.  But today the Red Cross came to help us.  Our roof only has Mal's plastic patches and more storms are on the way.  We have been offered tarps and financial assistance.  The same as all our neighbours have received.  And we took them up on the tarp offer.  It is a necessity.  I was impressed by the effort of a volunteer who explained how to identify bad stress and where to go for help.  There are 600 or so Army men helping out down our street.  There are volunteers from other states.  The Prime Minister has been here and declared it a National Disaster area and we are to receive federal aid at some stage.  Our house was a staging area for the church to provide lunch to volunteers.  It hadn't occurred that we are also part of the disaster.  Thank you all who support the Red Cross.  God Bless you.

More Storm Damage

Thought I'd share a link with information about our church.
Link

Storm 2008

Well, we were in a bad storm.  Mal was away but came home because of it.  The damage in our suburb is some of the worst I have ever seen.  The wind has blown off roofs, blown trees into cars and into houses.  Our roof no longer sheds water the way it should.  There is water in our walls.  Mal has repaired it so to speak but the repairs will not last long if the wind blows again.  The view of the park we had has changed.  The tall big gum trees are all gone, nothing but a fraction of the size they used to be.  Most of them left standing will not recover.  This has been a sobering experience.  I had a quick trip to college and Brisbane city was about its daily Monday business and seemed to not even know that an entire suburb had been flattened.  Wow.

PS:  We are all fine.

Post Marks

Why does so much of the mail that I receive from the US have postmarks from Europe?  This recently received letter was stamped in Zurich, Switzerland.  Previous letters marked in Munich.  I wonder....

The Game

If you visited the Journey site, I linked to in the last blog (even if only to check if I was really published), you would have seen the headlines of the November issue is “worship wars”.  So here it is, the long awaited position of Linda on music in worship.

Think of it like this.

There is this soccer team right, each player on the team has his own personal ball.  They may have gotten this ball as a gift from a loving parent when they were very little.  This young person played with the ball with parents, neighborhood friends, cousins probably played with anyone.  The purpose of this play was probably just for fun but the result was developing skills.  This young person then joins a team, like their-self, all the other players on the team have their own personal ball.  All of them bring their own balls to practice.  They move each others balls between them in drills, often repetitive, honing each skills individually.  As they get better, the coach comes along and introduces more skills.  Then they have a practice game, all the players on the team set their individual balls aside and use a ball that the coach has selected.  This ball may be a worn game ball but the standard will be consistent with regulations, unlike each individual ball which could have a variance in standard, not enough variance that it impedes the development of skill but varied none the less.  All the while, this player continues to practice with his ball at home or he won’t get to play in the big game.  When it comes to game day, the ball is a regulation ball.

Now, how would the team go if everyone tried to play the game with their own ball that they brought from home.  Chaos,  Or, how would it be if even if all the players left their ball on the sidelines and ran around chasing the ball on the field yelling, “My ball!”  Again, I think the individual’s focus on the ball being theirs and what that means to them, well, destroys the team.

I see worship sort of like this.  I individually know God, received faith as a gift from no other than God, Godself.  I use this individual faith at home, I practice it; challenging every day events with the gift that God has given.  But, eventually, I realize that this is not only fun at home, there can be more and I join a team.  In that team’s study group, I bounce around my gift, and experience skill building with it and with the gifts that others have, their own personal gifts.  I hone my discipleship.  Sometimes, by repetitive drills, doing them over and over again.  Sometimes, it is not for my sake but I am forces to repeat them because someone on my team needs more practice with that skill.  Sometimes they repeat things for me.  This is done under the watchful eye of a spiritual leader, one who knows the game, knows the big picture, one who continues to practice theirs skills and their skills should be evident.  Occasionally, the spiritual director will call all the members of the team together and have practice games, carefully choosing the gift for that game.  All the while, I continue to use my gift in my daily life.  But,then on Sunday morning or evening (or perhaps some other day), it is the game, worship.  God is there.  The God who gave all the gifts, he comes to watch his children demonstrate their use of the gift in worship.  This brings glory to him.  

What if we all bring our own ball into this event and focus on it?  What if we focus on God and sing out, “My, my, my” (like the bunch of sea gulls in Finding Nemo)?  Shouldn’t for that time, we give ourselves fully to be part of the team and for that time shouldn’t we sing, “Our?”

I get so frustrated with the argument that God is personal and if we only sing, “We, us and our” in worship people will not take responsibility for their own faith.  Rubbish.  Join the team, play the game, on game day worship our God and then take your gift home and  enjoy.

I am published!

I have had my first book review published in Journey   the Uniting Church Queensland Synod magazine.  The article appears in the November 2008 issue.

The editors deleted a sentence, I suppose to make it fit the space, so I include the review here in its entirety.

What Have They Done With Jesus? Beyond Strange Theories and Bad History

By Ben Witherington III

Monarch Books

RRP $24.95

This is a book for anyone who has been confused by or is interested in all the theories of Jesus’ life and relationships.  Ben Witherington sifts through many theories, rumors, historical documents and the Bible to determine what they reveal about Jesus.  

I found this book not only easy to read but delightfully insightful and compelling.  Ben does not adopt a view that extra-Biblical material should be rejected outright but reads the documents in their historical context to extract what they contribute to our understanding of who Jesus was.  He not only discusses issues around Jesus identity but also delves into his relationships. 

Ben is clear about where each idea comes from.  He presents each idea from its own context and allows the reader to make up his own mind.  He is also clear about when he is offering his interpretation and assumptions.  

The introduction of the book has a description of American culture in relation to his reason for writing the book.  I found for the most part that his explanation sits with the Australian culture but it still leaves the reader to make his own determination which is probably a good thing.  The book however quickly sets aside our culture and looks to answer the question, “What have they done with Jesus?”  

Caught out by compassion

My own.  I have a tendency to be a heart person, though over the years I have learned to balance head and heart and operate in a reasonable manner.  But last night the heart took over.  I was tired and have had a serious cold for two weeks and had the head operated at all, there would have been a different outcome.  That is not to say that this outcome is bad and the other better just that it would have been different.

I was at the airport in Guam ready to board my plane to Australia.  When they announced that the plane was overbooked and are there any volunteers to stay back.  I did not respond and noticed no one else did either.  As I was pacing, as is my custom before getting on a plane to sit for the next 4 hours, I happened by the counter and one agent ask the senior agent, “What happens if no one volunteers?”  The senior responded, “I have already arbitrarily picked people to stay back.”  

My heart was in action; how would I feel if I were one of the people arbitrarily picked?  I have witnessed this scenario.  People at the desk, upset, saying, “What do you mean I can’t board, I have a boarding pass.  I paid for my seat....”   I knew that is what I would say. 

My next thought was, how can I get on board knowing that my inaction put someone in that position?  I, of course, would feel bad.  The only pressure, I had was that my husband who I hadn’t seen in a week would be waiting.  And so driven by compassion for a person that didn’t even exist yet, I stepped up to the desk and asked if I volunteered what would happen and could I call my husband before I commit.  

I found very supportive and efficient staff.  They were on the phone immediately to work out connections.  After they were sure, I had good connections home they told me what would happen.  Then handed me a cell phone (not a mobile phone remember I am in Guam) so that I could call Mal.  I explained and although he was disappoint he agreed.  He too is compassionate. 

So, I stayed over in Guam and will later catch a flight through Japan to Brisbane.  It is longer but better because I will not be disrupted by getting gear off the plane at midnight and making my way to a hotel.  I can settle on the plane and sleep through.  Plus, I will start the trip not so tired.  

But had the head worked at all, I would have told the agent that I would volunteer, if the people he had selected really needed to get to Australia (more than I did).  As it turned out the people he chose were on a connecting flight with a tight connection.  And one of them was happy to stay back and his sense of adventure pressured the other to not complain.  The person who took my seat was like me, I want to get there but guess I could stay back.    So there was no upset person demanding to board.  I would not have had to feel guilty for getting on and leaving people behind.  

But this outcome was not all bad.  I called a friend here who joined me for breakfast and we had some good laughs.  I only get home 19 hours behind my original flight and I may be more comfortable in the end.  Plus, this beautiful view God made for me.

Also, I learned that when sick and tired and alone, I am a heart.  Much different when I am sick and tired and with my husband; because then it is about me and not others (including Mal).  I need a bit of balance in this area maybe.?! 

Why God won't let me take myself too seriously - Part 3

Well, Mal and I walked to church on Sunday.  It was a glorious morning.  After worship, we walked home.  We are maybe a kilometer from the church, following a bike/pedestrian walk that follows the creek.  

On the walk home, Mal and I are chatting and enjoying the time together, when suddenly, there was a sound a few feet behind me.  This noise I can best describe as a crunch of dry leaves.  At the sound of this unidentified, possibly life threatening noise, I instantly grabbed Mal's wrist, death grip, might be an appropriate description and I moved with lightening speed to a place in front of him where in the next instant, I would be able to thrust him between me and danger as some sort of human shield.  In that same instant, in my hyper awareness, I spotted the source of the unexpected noise.  You guessed it.  A bike.

Why, you ask is a cyclist not expected on a bike path?  Well, I can only imagine that I was so enthralled with the beauty of the day and time with my husband that I had no realization that the rest of the world was there.  Maybe not.  Anyway,  I started to howl with laughter.  Mal, then, asked if I would release his hand, he said something about blood needing to circulate.   I complied and continued to laugh.  

Later, when relating the story to my daughter and her husband, John asked, what kind of training have I had that would elicit such an immediate and perhaps, unthinkably, an important response.  Was it the military?  I don't think so.  I blame living on the ranch with my brothers who had nothing better to do than to scare (frighten silly, actually)  their sister at any opportunity.   I think now it is a response that would buy the precious time needed to decide, "Fly or Fight".

Mal and I grinned the rest of the day, as we recalled, how I was so willing to sacrifice him to protect me.  Funny, huh?

Last night I watched a movie

Last night a friend came over with a movie that we are going to show at church.  Our intention was to watch it and put together discussion questions.  The movie is As it is in Heaven .  A film from 2004 from Sweden.  What a fantastic film.!  After I wiped away tears at the end, I could only think of one question.  My friend was better off as this was the third time she watched it.  I don't like watching movies that will make me cry, my kids know this and I guess I didn't know that it was a tear jerker before I started.  

So what's this movie about you ask?  Well, you will just have to watch but I will tell you there are strong points of connection with real life throughout the whole movie.  And how does it end, well, As it is in Heaven, I guess.

I am really looking forward to watching this with my family. 

2002

Most people can remember where they were at particular moments in the past.  Mal and I were just musing about where we were in 2002.  Since I am not good at keeping a journal, I thought that I would put those memories here.  

At the beginning of '02 Mal and I were both living in Guam.  We were married on May 15th.  Then, immediately proceeded to process the immigration paperwork for our entry into Australia.  I was projected to attend an USAF training school at the end of June until August.  So I resigned from work, my girls and I scaled down all our belonging into I think 11 suitcases or boxes.  Basically, we shed most everything and travelled to Australia on a visitors visa.  Just days before typhoon Chataan (will check the spelling) hit Guam.  Note here people in Guam mark time by typhoon names.  

We spent a few days in our new home then traveled to the US.  Deb and Mia went to Grampa's in South Dakota and I went on to school in Texas.  Mal joined me there after a few weeks.  At then end of the school, Mal and I travelled to South Dakota on different airlines because the travel agent messed up but we both got there.  The girls and I had to wait until our visas were processed before we could return to Australia.  Mal went off to Western Samoa for work.  Mal had faith in the visa process and purchased the girls' and my tickets to Australia for mid-Sept.  Mal did email the consulate and tell them that we would just happen to be in LA mid-Sept could we get our visa.  The answer came a couple of weeks later, yes.  We were off.  

Before, I left South Dakota, my grandmother age 94 was diagnosed with terminal cancer.  She said, "Well you have to die of something."  My Dad's sister was very tired and crabby and suffering from pain in her shoulder.  We thought it stress from Gramma's impending death.  

While in Samoa, Mal broke his wrist, playing a friendly game of soccer.  Mal, they were younger and probably bigger than you! He came back to Australia a week later had his wrist re-broken and cast properly and all has been well.

Not long after getting to Australia, my Aunt was also diagnosed with terminal cancer.  Bummer, I was never to see her again and she had done a lot to raise me because my mother was sick.

Then in November, my Gramma past away.  I was in Cairns and started planning to come home for the funeral.  My Dad asked if I wanted to come to Gramma's funeral or my Aunt's.  He said she will die soon.  After an agonizing few hours, I called Dad and said I would wait.  Two weeks later my Aunt died and I made flights home.  

The church we attended every year about this time held a beach camp for young adults.  Mal and I were to lead one of the sessions during the week.  A lesson called "Hanging tough with change", do ya think we were qualified?!

My trip to the US meant that I would miss the first day of camp but I got my girl's to pack for me.  Mal then too missed most of the camp, because while I was in the US typhoon Pongsonga (I will check spelling) hit Guam and caused a major fire.  Mal was flown as part of the response team.  Deb also packed his bag as he left 2 hours after the call and was at the doctor.

I flew home only to realize that I was locked out of my house.  After a good cry. I remembered Mal had a hidden key and got in.  Threw some things together and got picked up to go to camp.  Mal returned on the last day of the camp. I knew very few people so it was an experience.  Probably good in retrospect because people got to know me as me not as Mal's wife.  

We then returned home for a couple of weeks and the four of us Mal and girls and I, left for 4 weeks in Samoa.  I was ready for this because life for an American in Australia was very tough at the time.  Australians were blaming Americans for sending their troops to Iraq.  I didn't mind catching flack most of the time but when people started pointing on my daughters, too young to vote, and abuse them for send troops and being war mongers.  I had enough.  Thank God for work in Samoa.  

Mal and I chatted about these memories last night because, he has sent in a resume for more work in Samoa.  I was remembering walking down the street almost every evening for ice cream, swimming (really, watching Mal and the girls swim as I was only just learning). a New Year's eve dance at the hotel, and scrapbooking withe the girls.  It was good.  Mal reminded me that we had a big fight while there.  It was our first, his nationalism took on mine and neither of us came out much better for it.  

I may also note that between the end of the camp and the trip to Samoa, I got drunk.  I didn't mean to I was having a wine with Mal's daughter and next thing I remember, I was, well sick.  Not a fine moment but I remember telling Mal's daughter about my Aunt and Gramma and well.  I guess, I was mourning.  

There was more and Mal may comment with his memories but it was a "full on" year.  

Motivation

I am motivated to lead a study on spiritual types at our church.  I am motivated to work on my Gospel of Mark assignment.  I am motivated to work on my Mission of the Church assignment. I am motivated to do my yard work and house keeping.  Sounds good doesn't it.  The problem is the next assignment due is Humanity, Sin and Grace and I am not motivated to work on that.  Procrastination has set in and I would rather work on all those other things.  I am happy that other things are getting done but soon, very soon, I am going to have to come up with about 3000 words assessing an academic's arguments on humanity and God for coherence.  They were coherent, now where to the other words come from?  Why am I happy to engage in the lectures, reading and topic but not the assignment?  Why is this the only subject, that I am not motivated to finish? Motivation seems to be as slippery topic as say, well, grace (update) that is understanding grace.

Water

Water is hugely important to life.  Because drought has been long-lasting in our part of the world Mal and I have installed rainwater tanks at our townhouse.  10,000 litres worth to be exact.  These tanks will be used to water the garden, wash the car, clean house and flush toilets.  The whole house can be connected to the tanks and Mal estimates at our present usage would last us 80 days.  Then, we would be out of water.  

Water theft has already begun to happen here.  I was told by a friend there that water was stolen from the tanks and swimming pool at the Australian Catholic University.  Right now greed, I imagine was the motivation but are we moving toward days when need will drive such actions? 

I wonder.....

What you mean to me

Again, this place has been neglected.  I had a two week trip away and even though I had the technology to continue to post reflections here I didn't.  Time just seemed to slip away and when there was a bit of time, I was simply too tired.  

I realize that this is how I treat probably a lot of my relationships.  I usually call my Dad every week but while I was gone, did not.  Many friends, I only catch up with once in a blue moon.  I am not totally to blame for this because they are busy too.  But I don't think relationships should be catch as catch can.  They are far too important.

From the notes of today's "Humanity, Sin and Grace" lecture, "Human beings who are created in the image of the triune God will find that image realized - proleptically - in the unity and diversity of the life of the church.  It is in that community that the desire for unity and completeness is expressed with respect to both other humans and to God. "(Summary of Stanley Grenz, The Social God and Relational Self) 

I have always place an emphasis on relationships.  Partly because I am an extrovert but also because I believe them to be priority.  I may not have had a theological reason years ago but intuitively knew it to be so.  You might say over the years, I had been formed that way.  And now find that others read the Bible that way too.

So my dear readers, I apologize for treating this different sort of relationship (blogging) casually and will endeavour to keep in contact.  Please forgive me when I fail.

Discernment

Discernment, divine insight or experiential guess-work?  Answer: Yes.  

Over the years, I have found that I catalogue peoples responses to particular situations by possible motivations.  My kids also know that I provide human commentary to animal antics that we observe in our yard but that is another story.  My library of experience, is not only full of Psych 101 type observations (people who respond with anger may be responding because of underlying fear or pain) but is primarily full of my reflections on my own responses, why did I say or do what I did?   I also have been privileged to walk with individuals in their difficult times and have been privy to their reflections.  All added to my library of possibilities, a library that I seem to draw on more these days.  While I thank God continually for these experiences and the gift of being able to catalogue the events for quick retrieval, I recognize that my library has significant limitations.  Its use can be based on the assumption that most people respond similarly thus the recognition of the library's name becomes important; it is just "guess-work". So many times my library lets me down, I am lost for a response.  It is at those humbling moments when God's glory shines.  God love for the individual I interact with stops me from saying something unhelpful and before I can think the most perfect words have come from my mouth.  Not words of idle commentary or of "guess-work" but words a gift from God for God's people, divine insight.  

I light of my conversation about ordination, I see this as another demonstration of God's faithfulness to his people.   The ordained are set apart because they have gifts that point to God; gifts the Church can recognize.  One of those gifts for me - discernment. Praise be to God.