Reflection on reflection

Have I stopped reflecting?  I seem to struggle to think of things to blog about.  I know that I am busy and most of my writing is for college or work.  When I began blogging, it seemed easy to pick up random thoughts and run with them a bit, however, now I don't seem to be able to concentrate on random thoughts.  Just too busy.  Busy is okay but ceasing to do reflection for me is not okay.  It is important that I see God; that includes my daily life.  Several times I have opened blogger only to close it again with no new post.  So I have restarted my effort reflecting on the stoppage of reflection. I sense that it is simply a part of the rhythm of life.  Sometimes, I will reflect more than at other times.  It could be that my life is simply got boring. 

Why God won't let me take myself too seriously - Part 4

I rushed out of the house today.  There had been a tradesman there replacing  screens damaged by the storm, so I was late. I sprinted to the bus stop and 2 meters from the door of the bus, the driver closed the door and drove away.  I couldn't believe it.  So I hiked quickly to The Gap village about 10 mins to catch the express bus, grabbed a sushi on the way because it was soon to be lunch time and the exercise had made me hungry.  Got to Milton for the eye exam that I was rushing to only to find out that the exam is next Tuesday.  So I walked across the tracks to the college where the Triune God lecture is and sat for an hour waiting for the lecture to start.  I would have time to get a sandwich and sit in comfort to eat which was the original plan but my hunger had driven me to wolf down a sushi on the run.  Today is hot and humid and my blouse was soaking wet by the time I got to Milton not only because of the sprint but also because the express bus does not stop as close to my destination and there was a hike at the other end as well.

I tried to tell Mal that he needs to take better care of me but he insists I read the calendar all by myself.

Somehow dignity seems to be so elusive for me. I thought I was being smart booking the exam before the lecture because they are in the same area.  Maybe next week it will seem to have been a smart thing.  Next week, I will be early to the bus

Repent

Mark 1:15 Jesus says, "The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God has come near; repent, and believe in the good news."  The word repent caught my attention, in order to repent one has to accept responsibility for the error in the first place.  They would have to acknowledge that they had made a mistake.  Does this happen much any more, or is it everyone else's fault? How freeing it would be for most to simply say, "I'm sorry".  

Have I offended? you bet I have - now I am sorry.  

Home from Holidays

Well believe it or not, we have nearly a gig of photos from our trip to the red centre of Australia.  It was a great time for so many reasons.  Mostly because God was there at every turn.  In conversations and in quiet.  So as a place to start, here is one of the awesome sights.

Travel is bad for my blog

When I travel, I don't take time to blog.  It is low on the priority list and catching up with people is high.  I was recently in Guam and had a few interesting experiences that I thought I would log here.  When I checked into the hotel, I was given a letter that explained that the cable TV would be experiencing outages while the company moved stuff.  I thought that is okay, I don't watch much TV.  Later that day, I finally paid the $10 US for one day (24 hours) of internet access to let Mal know I was there safe.  Then the next morning when I tried to connect to internet nothing happened.  I stopped at the front desk to say I didn't get 24 hours of access and the receptionist ask if I got the letter.  I asked what letter, she said the letter that explained that the cable was out.  I said, "Yes, I did and the internet runs through the cable, huh?" She affirmed that.  The letter did not mention internet.  Oh well, I should have known.

The next day, I got a letter from the hotel informing me that the next evening the city was shutting off the water overnight to repair a broken main down the street.  The letter also said the hotel would continue to operate on reserve water supply.  How many hotels have reserve water?  The outage was to be from 22pm to 4am.  Is 22pm a time?  2200 hours or 10 pm maybe?  

Of course, the outage began on time when did water return?  I don't know I left for work at 6:20am that is 0620 hours and there was no water then.  I was thankful, I had showered at a friends house the night before. 

Unlike other hotels in Guam, this hotel had a note that it cost $.75 to make a local phone call.  I thought no problem there are two pay phones next to the elevator in the lobby for $.25 .  I stopped on the way to make a local call, dialed the number then when instructed to insert a quarter, put a quarter into the slot.  The first phone would not take a quarter or any other currency for that matter.  The second phone just let the money go through the phone into the change slot.  So, I paid $.75 for local calls.  

I think there was a little earth quake on Saturday night at 7 pm. It had to be little but I was on the 11th floor.  

On Sunday morning there was a drunk in the parking lot, sitting on the ground with his head in the drivers seat of his car.  His windshield wipers were running but the car was not.  I tried to inform hotel security but they were suddenly no where to be found.  Most days, there were two or three of them hanging around.  

There were more Guam stories but I have forgotten.

On the flip side. The weather was wonderful.  I enjoy catching up with people and overall the work was good.  

I will not blog again for about 3 weeks as I am taking my Dad to the red center of Australia.  Will bring you photos. 

We change

As time passes we change.  My tastes have changed in food and in fashion as I have aged.  But also my sporting interests have changed.  After I moved to Australia, I found it difficult to watch Sunday football (Grid iron to Australians) because it comes on Monday mornings and I am at college on Monday mornings.  So I thought it prudent to begin to learn about some of the sports my husband enjoys.  Out of the many choices of sport, my husband follows AFL and the Brisbane Lions a bit and he follows Australian Cricket.  

As Mal is a patient man, he was able to answer my plethora of questions until now I can understand both games, but, I really enjoy cricket the most.  

I had the privilege of attending the Boxing day test at the MCG which was an extremely cool experience.  And now that the test series is over between Australia and South Africa, they play one day matches and a variation called 20/20.  This is a much different strategy to the same game and is very exciting to watch.

So why to I enjoy cricket. First I think I learned to enjoy sport because my brothers are extremely athletic and I have the hand eye coordination of a sheep.  I learned by watching to appreciate what they could do so easily and I could not.  

Cricket is a game of amazing thought and athleticism.  Last night, I watched a young man, J. P. Duminy, hit this amazing shot.  Unlike baseball you hit the ball hard, in cricket there is a bit of finesse and you can hit the ball in any direction.  Cricketers also hit the ball off a bounce unlike baseball.  Young Duminy stepped to the side of the crease as a bounced and got his bat under the ball and launched it over his head to the boundary behind him.  It was amazing.  Australia won the game but both teams are very good (S. Africa won the test series).

Have changed interests or have I just redirected an admiration? Am I just getting a bigger view of the talents that God created in man?  Adding breadth to my contextual library? Or is cricket just a reeeallly great game?

2009

Happy New Year.  I realize that we are almost a week into this year but it has been busy already.  Mal is away already for work.  I am trying to get some study done to lighten the load for next semester.  Yesterday, I spent some time hanging out with a friend who is going on a mission trip to Africa and have also spent some time with another friend who is bunking at our house on her holiday.  Then my two girls came and all of us went to Ikea and I bought curtains.  

Later my daughters' husbands came over and we watched movies and ate pizza.  It was a great day except for Mal missing.  While we were eating and watching, the whole house began to glow golden and even though no one could see the actual sunset (I have no west facing windows in the living room) everyone commented on how beautiful the sunset was.  They could see the golden glow through all the other windows.  I went out to actually see the sunset then came back for my camera.  

I really felt that all creation was calling to my soul to join in proclaiming the greatness of God.  Below is a photo of the sunset.  You can decide for yourself, as for me - God is truly Great!

Down under

It is Christmas.  My rose bushes are blooming.  Yes, roses for Christmas.   It seems somewhat odd to me.  I grew up in the northern hemisphere, where Christmas is nestled neatly into the cold and snow.  Perhaps, it is not so in America's south but where I grew up Christmas is cold.  This year, I have trimmed my tree and cut roses for the dining table.  After Christmas, we will go to the cricket.  I really mean, "the" cricket, as we will go to the MCG (Melbourne Cricket Ground) for the Boxing Day (the day after Christmas) test match.  There is a bat and ball so my American friends might think of it as a sport like baseball (although not at all like baseball) in December.  But remember, it is not cold it is summer here, the roses are blooming and the game is on.

Prayers for you and your family though this blessed time when we remember God's gift to the world and anticipate Christ's coming into the world.

Merry Christmas to all!

Don't ask why

I love the outdoors.  Last week, Mal and I were in North Queensland, Etty beach near Innisfail to be exact.  There I watch a Cassowary and baby, they are fascinating.  There was a man above the retaining wall trying to scare them away.  He was a safe distance as the parent was over a meter (bit more than a yard) tall.  He said that they are not too smart.  They actually look a bit dinosaur to me with the horn and all.  Don't ask why they have a horn.

Then at the beach in the wet sand were many beads of sand push out of holes by mini crabs.

  The beads made beautiful patterns on the beach.  They seemed to be star-shaped patterns but were probably quite random.  Don't ask why they made pretty patterns.  

These are things I don't know, I just observe.  I have to admit, I have lots of observations and don't really know anything about them.  Sometimes, I wager a guess.  Sometimes, maybe divine inspiration gives me knowledge.  A lot, I just don't know.  God knows and most of the time that is good enough for me.  

Weddings are a big deal

The wedding was Saturday and I am still a bit tired.  Yesterday, I literally just showed up at things there was not much thinking or anything; but I was there.  The wedding was a lot of fun and went very well.  It was all beautiful.  So why am I so tired?  Mia and Sam did almost everything (Mal and I and Sam's parents did fork out dough) but the work was done by a determined young couple.  I think Deb support Mia a lot as only sisters can do.  And Sam's mom recycled a dress for Mia.  But I am tired.  I didn't sleep much on Friday night, that is because my girls didn't sleep.  So I am sure that contributes.  I imagine my tired is because I put all my emotion and spirit into wanting their wedding to be perfect and not getting in their way.  I am so glad for them that this is behind them and they can press forward into the world and life ahead of them.   Mia n Sam - if your watching,  I love you both and pray that you have a wonderful trip. I can't wait till you get back to hear all about it.  Take lots of photos!

Keep Watch

There is a wedding dress hanging from my balcony in the middle of my living room.  The dress has been carefully ironed and hangs high so that it will not get crushed in a closet.  It is covered with a sheet to keep it clean.  I feel pretty sure that all the details for my daughter's wedding on Saturday have been addressed.  I am just keeping watch, trimmed the lamps, have plenty of oil, but I know the hour of the wedding.

Today, I will put up our Christmas tree (meant to have the done already :) in preparation for Christmas.  I have some gifts to put under the tree so am just about ready for Christmas day.  But there is more than celebrating that Christ came.  I expect the Lord's return though I don't know the hour.  Sometimes I forget that he is coming and have my life busy and so full already that there would scarcely be time for that appointed day.  I plan to take some time, this Christmas to be ready too for the advent (coming) of the Lord.   I am not sure really how to do that but I imagine it like getting ready for my girl's wedding.  I sat and listened to what they wanted then worked my heart out to make that happen for them because I love them so.  I will take some time to listen to what God wants then with all my heart make it happen.  I will let you know how that goes.....

Twisted

We have a pine tree in our yard.  In a few months, the tree will provide pine nuts for the local parrots.

This tree is normally a near perfectly round, ornamental tree.  But the storm has changed the tree's orientation.

Over a year ago, I had the opportunity to take a trauma ministry workshop run by the US military chaplains.  The context they used was, of course, military; however, the information presented was easily extracted and put into any trauma situation.  

One point made was that trauma can twist an individual's view of God.  We were then given some tools to help correct that.  Step one - make sure my orientation didn't get twisted.

Update

Well, huge orange tarps cover our roof and overall they are doing a wonderful job.  Mother Nature, however, is severely challenging Mals ability to be a good steward of the nice home God has blesses us with.  Every day is hot and humid and every afternoon more thunderstorms, wind, rain and in some places hail, so every morning Mal gets up and resets the tarps from where the wind has moved them to where the need to be.  Every evening storm leaves Mal pacing exclaiming that he can't believe the wind has moved the tarps again.  I am also amazed because the tarps are not only roped down but are actually bolted to the brick walls of the house.  But for the most part the tarps are doing what they should be doing.  UPDATE:  The SES have just come to check tarps after last night's wind and offered Mal a job with North Queensland  crew.  He will be chuffed.

In addition to all our goings and comings, our house has been a staging area for food and water distribution.  There has been, I don't know how many people or how much food go through our house into the community for families and workers.  

My washing machine only gets about 8 hours rest a day, the same as the rest of us.  

On Wed the storm that came through made Mal's daughter Sally a victim as well.  Her unit sits above the garage and is near a creek.  The storm washed all the debris down the creek to a bridge where it flooded and filled Sally's garages with nearly a meter of water and mud.  She lost much of the stuff she had stored in the garage.  Every storm brings more damage to more communities all around.  Flooding is happening all over the country.

The neighbourhoods are for the most part travel-able so on the outside things appear quite normal but I know that inside homes people are still reeling.  There is subtle damage.  Our neighbour and friend died suddenly on Wed.  He was elderly so you can't really say that it was storm damage but it leaves you wondering.  

Thank you everyone for your prayers and support.  We (our whole community) will soon be back on its feet because of your response.  

Red Cross

I was not ready for the Red Cross to knock on my door.  Mal and I are doers.  I can't think that I have ever received much of anything but prayers and comfort, maybe a meal at anytime.  But today the Red Cross came to help us.  Our roof only has Mal's plastic patches and more storms are on the way.  We have been offered tarps and financial assistance.  The same as all our neighbours have received.  And we took them up on the tarp offer.  It is a necessity.  I was impressed by the effort of a volunteer who explained how to identify bad stress and where to go for help.  There are 600 or so Army men helping out down our street.  There are volunteers from other states.  The Prime Minister has been here and declared it a National Disaster area and we are to receive federal aid at some stage.  Our house was a staging area for the church to provide lunch to volunteers.  It hadn't occurred that we are also part of the disaster.  Thank you all who support the Red Cross.  God Bless you.

More Storm Damage

Thought I'd share a link with information about our church.
Link

Storm 2008

Well, we were in a bad storm.  Mal was away but came home because of it.  The damage in our suburb is some of the worst I have ever seen.  The wind has blown off roofs, blown trees into cars and into houses.  Our roof no longer sheds water the way it should.  There is water in our walls.  Mal has repaired it so to speak but the repairs will not last long if the wind blows again.  The view of the park we had has changed.  The tall big gum trees are all gone, nothing but a fraction of the size they used to be.  Most of them left standing will not recover.  This has been a sobering experience.  I had a quick trip to college and Brisbane city was about its daily Monday business and seemed to not even know that an entire suburb had been flattened.  Wow.

PS:  We are all fine.

Post Marks

Why does so much of the mail that I receive from the US have postmarks from Europe?  This recently received letter was stamped in Zurich, Switzerland.  Previous letters marked in Munich.  I wonder....

The Game

If you visited the Journey site, I linked to in the last blog (even if only to check if I was really published), you would have seen the headlines of the November issue is “worship wars”.  So here it is, the long awaited position of Linda on music in worship.

Think of it like this.

There is this soccer team right, each player on the team has his own personal ball.  They may have gotten this ball as a gift from a loving parent when they were very little.  This young person played with the ball with parents, neighborhood friends, cousins probably played with anyone.  The purpose of this play was probably just for fun but the result was developing skills.  This young person then joins a team, like their-self, all the other players on the team have their own personal ball.  All of them bring their own balls to practice.  They move each others balls between them in drills, often repetitive, honing each skills individually.  As they get better, the coach comes along and introduces more skills.  Then they have a practice game, all the players on the team set their individual balls aside and use a ball that the coach has selected.  This ball may be a worn game ball but the standard will be consistent with regulations, unlike each individual ball which could have a variance in standard, not enough variance that it impedes the development of skill but varied none the less.  All the while, this player continues to practice with his ball at home or he won’t get to play in the big game.  When it comes to game day, the ball is a regulation ball.

Now, how would the team go if everyone tried to play the game with their own ball that they brought from home.  Chaos,  Or, how would it be if even if all the players left their ball on the sidelines and ran around chasing the ball on the field yelling, “My ball!”  Again, I think the individual’s focus on the ball being theirs and what that means to them, well, destroys the team.

I see worship sort of like this.  I individually know God, received faith as a gift from no other than God, Godself.  I use this individual faith at home, I practice it; challenging every day events with the gift that God has given.  But, eventually, I realize that this is not only fun at home, there can be more and I join a team.  In that team’s study group, I bounce around my gift, and experience skill building with it and with the gifts that others have, their own personal gifts.  I hone my discipleship.  Sometimes, by repetitive drills, doing them over and over again.  Sometimes, it is not for my sake but I am forces to repeat them because someone on my team needs more practice with that skill.  Sometimes they repeat things for me.  This is done under the watchful eye of a spiritual leader, one who knows the game, knows the big picture, one who continues to practice theirs skills and their skills should be evident.  Occasionally, the spiritual director will call all the members of the team together and have practice games, carefully choosing the gift for that game.  All the while, I continue to use my gift in my daily life.  But,then on Sunday morning or evening (or perhaps some other day), it is the game, worship.  God is there.  The God who gave all the gifts, he comes to watch his children demonstrate their use of the gift in worship.  This brings glory to him.  

What if we all bring our own ball into this event and focus on it?  What if we focus on God and sing out, “My, my, my” (like the bunch of sea gulls in Finding Nemo)?  Shouldn’t for that time, we give ourselves fully to be part of the team and for that time shouldn’t we sing, “Our?”

I get so frustrated with the argument that God is personal and if we only sing, “We, us and our” in worship people will not take responsibility for their own faith.  Rubbish.  Join the team, play the game, on game day worship our God and then take your gift home and  enjoy.

I am published!

I have had my first book review published in Journey   the Uniting Church Queensland Synod magazine.  The article appears in the November 2008 issue.

The editors deleted a sentence, I suppose to make it fit the space, so I include the review here in its entirety.

What Have They Done With Jesus? Beyond Strange Theories and Bad History

By Ben Witherington III

Monarch Books

RRP $24.95

This is a book for anyone who has been confused by or is interested in all the theories of Jesus’ life and relationships.  Ben Witherington sifts through many theories, rumors, historical documents and the Bible to determine what they reveal about Jesus.  

I found this book not only easy to read but delightfully insightful and compelling.  Ben does not adopt a view that extra-Biblical material should be rejected outright but reads the documents in their historical context to extract what they contribute to our understanding of who Jesus was.  He not only discusses issues around Jesus identity but also delves into his relationships. 

Ben is clear about where each idea comes from.  He presents each idea from its own context and allows the reader to make up his own mind.  He is also clear about when he is offering his interpretation and assumptions.  

The introduction of the book has a description of American culture in relation to his reason for writing the book.  I found for the most part that his explanation sits with the Australian culture but it still leaves the reader to make his own determination which is probably a good thing.  The book however quickly sets aside our culture and looks to answer the question, “What have they done with Jesus?”  

Caught out by compassion

My own.  I have a tendency to be a heart person, though over the years I have learned to balance head and heart and operate in a reasonable manner.  But last night the heart took over.  I was tired and have had a serious cold for two weeks and had the head operated at all, there would have been a different outcome.  That is not to say that this outcome is bad and the other better just that it would have been different.

I was at the airport in Guam ready to board my plane to Australia.  When they announced that the plane was overbooked and are there any volunteers to stay back.  I did not respond and noticed no one else did either.  As I was pacing, as is my custom before getting on a plane to sit for the next 4 hours, I happened by the counter and one agent ask the senior agent, “What happens if no one volunteers?”  The senior responded, “I have already arbitrarily picked people to stay back.”  

My heart was in action; how would I feel if I were one of the people arbitrarily picked?  I have witnessed this scenario.  People at the desk, upset, saying, “What do you mean I can’t board, I have a boarding pass.  I paid for my seat....”   I knew that is what I would say. 

My next thought was, how can I get on board knowing that my inaction put someone in that position?  I, of course, would feel bad.  The only pressure, I had was that my husband who I hadn’t seen in a week would be waiting.  And so driven by compassion for a person that didn’t even exist yet, I stepped up to the desk and asked if I volunteered what would happen and could I call my husband before I commit.  

I found very supportive and efficient staff.  They were on the phone immediately to work out connections.  After they were sure, I had good connections home they told me what would happen.  Then handed me a cell phone (not a mobile phone remember I am in Guam) so that I could call Mal.  I explained and although he was disappoint he agreed.  He too is compassionate. 

So, I stayed over in Guam and will later catch a flight through Japan to Brisbane.  It is longer but better because I will not be disrupted by getting gear off the plane at midnight and making my way to a hotel.  I can settle on the plane and sleep through.  Plus, I will start the trip not so tired.  

But had the head worked at all, I would have told the agent that I would volunteer, if the people he had selected really needed to get to Australia (more than I did).  As it turned out the people he chose were on a connecting flight with a tight connection.  And one of them was happy to stay back and his sense of adventure pressured the other to not complain.  The person who took my seat was like me, I want to get there but guess I could stay back.    So there was no upset person demanding to board.  I would not have had to feel guilty for getting on and leaving people behind.  

But this outcome was not all bad.  I called a friend here who joined me for breakfast and we had some good laughs.  I only get home 19 hours behind my original flight and I may be more comfortable in the end.  Plus, this beautiful view God made for me.

Also, I learned that when sick and tired and alone, I am a heart.  Much different when I am sick and tired and with my husband; because then it is about me and not others (including Mal).  I need a bit of balance in this area maybe.?!